Downward TrENZ

Spring Chick Challenge–Week 7 Recap

2012-02-19T11:38:00.001-05:00

I really feel like Week 7 was a waste of a week in weight loss land.

I was doing well following my metabolic diet up until Tuesday night. Then Wednesday morning I had to go for some upper G.I. tests, which meant fasting and then drinking that awful barium chalky drink.

From then, the entire week went downhill and I am hoping the slide ends today. First, after I left the clinic I knew I had to eat, I was shaky, sweaty, dizzy – all signs of low blood sugar – so I went to Tim’s and got a breakfast sandwich. Still determined to follow my diet as close as possible but knowing I needed carbs quickly, I took off half the English muffin and ate the bottom half, the egg and the ham (didn’t get the cheese). I drank my tea and within 15 minutes I felt better. I got on the subway and two stops later had to get off because I knew I was going to throw up.

Thankfully I know Union Station like the back of my hand so I was able to sprint to the washrooms.

The day and the week just kept getting worse from then. I don’t know if I was sick because of GERD, the barium swallow, low blood sugar or some other random configuration – but it lasted all day. The nausea, the shaking, the fever/chills. That night I was so tired I went to bed early.

The next day I decided to go easy on my stomach and just eat some toast and chamomille tea and forget about the metabolic diet for a day until my stomach could stomach real food. I made it til lunch time and then it hit again.

Friday was the same. I did go out for dinner with some friends on Friday night but it was more for the company and because I had cancelled a few weeks ago and didn’t want to again. I did order food but picked at it and only ate some toast and coffee.

Saturday I pretty much stayed in bed until 3 p.m. and when I got up I made some homemade chicken soup for me and Liam and had a piece of rye toast. There were a few iffy moments where I didn’t think it was going to stay down…but so far so good.

I didn’t get to WW yesterday as they close at noon. My scale yesterday afternoon showed an increase that isn’t possible by any laws of physics, so I’m hoping its a combination of being ill and not eating properly for 4 days and extra sodium.

This morning I am feeling more human. No fever, no chills and no stomach problems. So I’ll eat lightly today and hopefully tomorrow can try eating properly again and lose these pounds that shouldn’t really be there.

Like I said, Week 7 – no progress – a complete waste in the weight loss world. Let’s hope Week 8 is a bit more productive.

Spring Chick Challenge–Week 6 Recap

2012-02-12T12:48:00.001-05:00

	Weigh in this week – 204.3 which is 2.5 down. Total down for the challenge is 9.5.
	My eye continues to heal. Some days are better than others, but overall, it’s getting better and better.
	My new way of eating this week was following a metabolic diet which is very low carb. Although I’ve been low-processed-carbs for several years, I realised I was still eating too many natural carbs – fruit, brown rice, oatmeal, root vegetables and decided to try something different. My biggest challenge was replacing the carb calories with protein calories so I wouldn’t be hungry. For a non-carnivore, this was hard…but I’m getting there! The diet is very close to Atkins Phase 1. I’ll write more about it and how I”m making it work for me, in a separate post.
	That’s my joke for the day! The weather is not cooperating with me and I am not cooperating with myself by pushing myself to the treadmill. Between my eye and the “just not feeling like it” mood this week, exercise was non existent.
	This is a good tip – I’ve been doing this for years, it also makes you very conscious of when you go for seconds so you have a better idea of how much you’re actually eating. So I’ll keep doing this!

My goals for this week are pretty much the same:

Stick to the metabolic diet for another week before going to Phase 2
Exercise
Water, water, water, water
Check in with my SCC buddy once a day
Read blogs and be supportive

I had all kinds of plans for today but woke up with a sinus cold and was coughing most of the night so I cancelled everything in favour of sleeping in, which did help a little. I am going to go back to bed for a few hours before my eldest son comes home and I have to start the food/work/school prep stuff for the week ahead. I swear the clocks from Friday night to Sunday night go at double time…do you ever feel that way?

I need to review my goals from the beginning of the challenge and see where I am at half way point – but not today.

Snowy Saturday

2012-02-11T13:13:00.000-05:00

Winter has hit the GTA (Greater Toronto Area) full force today. I had to clear about 3 inches of snow off my car before I could leave to go to WW this morning. I'm only 5 feet tall which means I can't reach to the middle of my windshields without leaning right across my car - I was frozen and feeling very snowmanish by the time I was done.

The weigh in was good. I was down 2.5 lbs. The receptionist said I lost 3.5 and I was thrilled to bits, but when I got to my car and did the math, it's actually only 2.5 which brings my weight to 204.3. Closer and closer to Onederland. I was really disappointed at first but the wonderful Tiffany reminded me that 2.5 is an excellent loss. I also reminded myself that last week's loss was a bonus because I had really eaten badly the days leading up to it, so 6 lbs in two weeks is actually pretty awesome. Also, there was no exercise at all this week.

I had hoped to get a run in today but unless I can convince myself to treadmill it - its not happening. Funnily enough I had a snowshoeing class scheduled for this morning and the company cancelled it yesterday afternoon due to "lack of snow". I don't know if there would have been enough packed snow to actually do it today - but I thought it was funny. I'm hoping to still be able to do that this Winter.

Spring Chick Challenge–Week 6 Check In

2012-02-08T19:20:00.001-05:00

My word for this week is "submersed".

I have submersed myself in a whole new way of eating. Today is Day 4 and I am committed to two weeks. Today I was a little more creative in my cooking and enjoyed my dinner more than I have the first three nights, so it's all about relearning how to cook and what makes a meal.

I am scouring blogs and recipe sites for ideas and inspiration. I would like to get to the point where it's not about food - it's about fuel for my body -but I'm not there yet. Right now, it's about the food.

My scale is showing a slight drop since last Friday's weigh in - keeping my fingers crossed it carries through to Saturday morning.

I realised driving home tonight that it is Valentine's Weekend coming up and although I survived my first Valentine's Day alone last year, the thought of it this year is a bit depressing. Not that I expected to have a new love of my life yet, but I miss Couplehood, you know?

Monday Mash

2012-02-06T19:32:00.001-05:00

	Eye Update Thankfully my baby blues are well on the road to recovery, not 100% there yet but getting closer. The opthomologist took out the contact lens bandage and although I did feel some slight irritation, it wasn’t painful and every day it should get better. I am going to miss my contacts for the next month or so. I hate glasses!
	Cross Fit Workout My trial class was Kettlebell class. Well.. that was a story. I thought it was tonight but turns out its next week. Now after driving to a scary (to me) part of Hamilton in the dark to an area I’ve never been to, you would think I would have just gone in and asked if I could do today instead since I was there. I didn’t. 1. I am really not good at asking for stuff like that when I committed to a different day. 2. I admit it did look a bit scary and intimidating inside. 3. My eye was hurting me on the way there from the lights and when I realised the mix up, I thought maybe it was for the best anyway.
	Food I am changing up my routine this week. Will tell you all about it (success or epic fail) on the weekend when I do my Spring Chick weekly check in.
	Random Otherness I could really get used to not working. Although I wasn’t really well the last few days, not working was really nice and because it was unplanned, it was really, really nice to just go with the flow of the day and have no plans. I need to win the lottery or find a sugar daddy so I can keep living the lifestyle I’d like to become accustomed to.
	Health I am feeling very much better. I think we’ve licked the breathing issues, I’m sleeping better, have way more energy than I did a month ago and feel so much less stressed.
	Blessed I am reminded again this week how very lucky I am to have amazing people in my life who love me, take care of me, encourage and support me, teach me and make me smile.
	Here’s to a great week ahead for all of us! Now my eye really is hurting so I am going to take T3 and go to bed because tomorrow is back to work.

Spring Chick Challenge–Week 5 Update

2012-02-04T19:06:00.001-05:00

What a cute badge! Thanks Stormy!

My 5 week total loss is 7 lbs. I am back on the path to Onederland and this time I need to find the formula to keep me below that 200 number and keep going down. I’m working on a plan in my head, not quite ready to share though.

Week 4/5 – Had a bit of setback with my eye injury in both exercising and food but the worst is over and I am back on track and going full strength. I managed to be caffeine free for 14 days and had limited sugar to once a week, but now I am starting my count over as the last three days have been very much off plan and off track.

My next eye check up is on Monday and if all goes well, and the contact lens bandage is removed, I have a cross fit class at 6:15 that night – a kettle bell class! I am a bit scared but at the same time, am looking forward to something new. Once my eye has healed I will be back to running and my Tues/Thurs/Sat/Sun schedule of exercise like I planned last week.

At the start of the challenge I was aiming for 1lb a week so I am a bit ahead of schedule, but not getting cocky as I know my pattern of weight loss. I would love to be back under 200 by the end of the challenge…that’s my goal and I’m working towards it.

Best moment so far was running those 30 min last week after so long of not being able to. I don’t think there’s been a “worst moment” yet. I’m trudging along. There have been lots of great moments, meeting Leigh, signing up for two more races, the boxfit class, the smallest size in my favourite plus size store (Avenue) being too big, being called Skinny Minny by a coworker (who is a real skinny minny herself)….realising I can live without sugar and caffeine every day!

So this week ahead I’m focusing on getting back to exercising, tightening up my food choices and generally working on getting as healthy as I can. Stuff is gonna happen, stuff I can’t control – it’s what I choose to do NEXT that is important.

Would love a buddy!!!! I am always available by text/email or MSN messenger because they are on my iPhone but any other kind of chat is iffy because I am not on my laptop much anymore and my evenings are usually full of domesticity or trying to fit in exercise or sleep! So Stormy if you’re coordinating, I’d be glad to send you my contact info, just let me know!

Hope you all have a great week 6.

Eye’m back.

2012-02-03T18:21:00.001-05:00

My eye is so much better today. Truly, our bodies are amazing creations capable of so much more than we think or give them credit for.

Even up to last night, I was in a huge amount of pain and could barely keep my eye open at all and light was extremely painful. Less than 24 hours later, although my vision is blurred in that eye, the pain is so much less and the light is just annoying rather than painful. I am sincerely hoping by Monday to be completely as good as new. I am still babying it until the contact lens bandage comes off on Monday so I am trying to keep it dry, out of the wind/elements and as clean as possible to speed up healing.

I don’t actually know what the cause was, whether I tore it trying to take out a contact lens or whether the lens itself was the cause – either way, it is extremely painful and I truly hope none of you ever experience it.

Thanks so much for your well wishes and concern. It meant a lot to me. I have to say I have amazing friends. My friend Shelley and her husband Kevin took awesome care of me for two days - letting me live in their home and driving me to medical appointments and making sure I was fed and comfortable. I am so blessed to know them.

I did get to WW today to weigh in and lost 3.5 lbs...which is a bit of miracle considering since Tuesday I have eaten out meals because of this injury and being away from home. And I’ve been unable to exercise. I am working diligently to make sure I don't have a regain next week. This is also a carryover from last week which was PMS week....but regardless...I'll take it!!! Onederland is in sight again!

I’m going to say this is my Week 5 weigh in for the challenge as I am so skewed in the timeline and just continue along with the weeks as set out by Stormy so I don’t get all mixed up and don’t have confusing posts! I’ll do a proper Week 5 recap on the weekend.

Quickie

2012-02-02T13:27:00.001-05:00

Just a quick post. I have not abandoned the challenge! I tore the cornea of my right eye on Tuesday and have been pretty much out of commission since then. Although today the pain is much less my vision is very blurred. Have not gone to WW but hoping I can see well enough to go on Saturday. I am touch typing and can't read the screen so hopefully this makes sense. Will be back in a few days!

Persistent and Constant

2012-01-30T19:33:00.001-05:00

“The secret to success is constancy to purpose.”

~Benjamin Disraeli

“Energy and persistence conquer all things.”

~ Benjamin Franklin

I believe the key to succeeding at anything is being persistent and constant.

Don't give up and keep at it. Not half-assed at it....but continually chipping away until you find the angel in the stone.

The last few months I've only been doing half that equation properly. Persistent? Yes. After all, I am a Scorpio and we never give in or give up :) But the consistency has been lacking in both eating and exercise. The problem I have is doing both consistently well at the same time.

Funny, cause I'm one hell of a multi-tasker!

There's no magic formula. I just have to do it and I have before.

So driving home tonight on ice and snow covered highways, I made a decision to go back to my 4 x a week workouts. Tues/Thurs/Sat/Sun worked best for me and that's what I'm going back to. Doesn't have to be a full on, sweat til I drop work out, just move for at least 30 minutes each of those days. I have a race at the end of March so running should be my major activity between now and then as long as my breathing keeps getting better it shouldn't be a problem.

Eating...I do really well most of the time...but most of the time isn't giving me the results I want. I've been pondering the problem of food for the last few weeks and as yet don't have an answer but I'm getting closer. I'll keep you posted. I know I need to count "something" otherwise it is real easy for that 1/2 cup of pasta to become a full bowl again. I need some kind of built in control that I can stick to, guesstimating doesn't work for me.

I like WW because it does have control and healthier foods are lower in points, so it does encourage healthy eating and it allows for the indulgences now and again - and to be completely truthful, its not the indulgences that are my problem. Indulgences are few and far between. It's the "What a crappy day, I'm so tired tonight, I'll just eat cheese and crackers, or cereal with milk, or leftover whatever". Not in huge quantities either, but definitely bigger than they should be and definitely not balanced meals.

When I was first diagnosed with Type II diabetes, I made it my mission to eat to lower my blood sugar and I did that. Although I am still on some meds, I am on the lowest dosage possible and my blood sugar is consistently within the normal range. Some days, I actually forget to take the meds and my blood sugar still stays within normal. My hope is that as I drop more weight and get closer to my goal, that I will be able to go off the diabetes meds completely. Anyway, back then, I refused to eat anything that would have a negative impact on my blood sugar and I did that for a long time until it became a habit to think first and eat second.

Maybe this is what I need to do now? The problem is not calories in/calories out (and this post is not to start a debate on that!), it’s good for me calories in and enough calories out. By “good for me” I mean my body and my health issues and my weight loss goals. I think I know what that is – I just need to find a way to do it – consistently so it works.

I’ll keep ya posted.

Rambling Thoughts on a Snowy Day

2012-01-29T17:32:00.002-05:00

Where do the weekends go? These two days have flown by.

Today Leigh and I went for a 5k walk with her lovely dog, Finn (hope I'm spelling that right!) along the Hamilton beachfront. It was the perfect mix of wind and sunshine on a Winter day. We did three intervals of running 60 seconds each and then decided to walk the rest of the way.

I woke up this morning in a lot of pain - not sure if it was from the run yesterday and getting so cold or just one of those days I've talked about, where everything hurts. Going out and walking took a lot of energy, both physical and mental but it was good to stretch the sore muscles and get fresh air.

The rest of the day was mostly dedicated to domesticity. Cooking, cleaning, organizing for the week ahead - you know all the stuff that makes life so exciting! I had a short nap and watched a bit of TV, read some blogs and I feel like I could fall asleep standing up.

The snow is coming down pretty hard right now and my youngest, Liam, is hoping for a snow day tomorrow. He has his final exam tomorrow so I'm hoping the weather is good so he can just get it out of the way and enjoy the last few days off before he starts second semester. I'm also hoping the roads are okay tomorrow to get to the GO Station for work. I leave so early that sometimes the ploughs and icers haven't been out yet and the roads down the mountain can get quite icy as well as the ramp onto the 403.

I've been thinking a lot today about what I eat and realise although I eat very clean compared to even a year ago - very little processed food and that is mostly when I eat out or at someone else's home - there is still a lot of carbs. The starchy vegetables, corn, potatoes, sweet potatoes, squash, peas....and although I eat brown rice and brown pasta, and keep the portion sizes to half a cup at a time, they are still very high carb.

Over the years I've tried to adapt an Atkins or Dukan style diet but never seem to stick to it for more than a week at a time. I really don't like meat and have always eaten very little meat of any kind, since I was a little girl. Its the texture, doesn't matter how I try it cooked - or what kind of meat, and sometimes it feels very heavy in my stomach. Most of the meat alternatives are carbs - so although it isn't impossible for me to follow a lower-carb diet, it takes a ton of planning and organization to make balanced meals. I often wonder if I really *had* to do it, could I? And what does that mean about why I don't think I can now?

Just rambling questions in my head and although I do try and strive for lower carb meals on a day to day basis, it is nowhere near a "low carb" lifestyle. My endocrinologist advises a diet that focuses on the lower glycemic carbs rather than low carb.

On another note, I bought a new cookbook from Weight Watchers which focuses on fruit and vegetables and are all in single portions which works out perfectly for me and I have new ideas for lunches.

Spring Chick Challenge–Mid Week Check in #4

2012-01-28T16:41:00.001-05:00

Hey we’ve been at this 4 weeks. We rock!!!!

Here’s the quick and dirty on me -

1. Exercise


Pre run!	Post run! – my hair is wet from sweat not snow!	Stats from C25K app.

Go me! I ran outside today for the first time since the Resolution Run. I ran 30 min straight (no walking or rest breaks). I actually can’t remember the last time I ran that long continuously – sometime in November. The app sets up a 5 min warm up, 30 min run and 5 min cool down, so its a 40 min workout in all. My breathing was the best it’s been during exercise in months. I know some of you run every day no matter the weather, but this was a huge obstacle for me to overcome, running in the cold and slush. I am terrified of falling and reinjuring my tailbone and I hate the cold. I was very cautious and went very slowly as it was snowing and the slush on the ground was starting to refreeze. It was also really, really windy. A couple of times, I Iost my cap and had to chase it! All in all though, I am feeling proud of getting out there in the snow, cold, wind and slush and for just pushing through. It wasn’t easy, it really felt like I was running for the first time – it took about 2 km for my legs and feet to remember how to run, and when I heard the prompts, “half way there”, “10 minutes left”, “5 minutes left” “1 minute left”, I just kept telling myself I could do this, I have done it before, just don’t stop. Pace was slow, but I am hoping this is Day 1 of my Comeback. Although I can’t say it was enjoyable, it was way better than the same amount of time on the treadmill or elliptical. And now…I’ve got a race to train for people!
I’m meeting blogger Leigh for a walk or possible run/walk tomorrow morning and will try the 30 min again in the afternoon in the weather holds out and it’s not icy.

2. Food
Not so great the last two days. I needed to refocus. I was really tired Thursday and Friday and when that happens, I either eat crap or don’t eat at all because either way, it’s less work. Neither is a good option for me and I went through both scenarios at various points during those two days. Today I am back on track though and am in control. Never underestimate the power of a good night’s sleep!

3. Health
Feeling so much better. We should not take breathing for granted. It’s amazing how much it affects so many aspects of our health.

4. Random stuff
Trying to get a trial crossfit class sorted for next week – that will be my new activity for this week. The Zumba class I wanted to go to was cancelled this morning.

I know you are all just finishing your fourth week so I’m off to read blogs and leave some witty comments. You’ll hear from me on Wednesday with my Week 4 results.

To join or not to join….

2012-01-26T20:47:00.000-05:00

Back in November I joined a local gym because my running had already dropped off considerably, partly because of an injury and some breathing problems, but mostly because I didn’t like to run in the dark or in the cold. The cold didn’t turn out to be such a problem as we’ve had a mild Winter for the most part, but the dark was. Guenther, my awesome running partner all summer, had far surpassed me in speed and I found I was running alone in the dark. I did it for a week or two, but it made me nervous and and the more I tried to do it, the more reluctant I became to run at all – which wasn’t helping me whilst trying to understand this “running love” that I didn’t have.

Anyway…the point is, I joined the gym to get through the Winter, so I bought a 90 day membership, which will end on February 24th. Part of the joining package included 2 Personal Trainer sessions, a box fit session and of course their spiel on their own nutrition plan and personal training sessions. It was a good sales pitch and to be truthful, the PT I worked with was a really nice guy, very patient, explained everything to me (the how and the why) and really pushed me to do more than I would have done on my own.

I went back and forth in my head. The nutrition plan is basically a preset meal plan with recipes, grocery lists etc. based on my personal caloric needs and food preferences. It would be nice to be handed something that tells me what to eat and when and not have to think about it, but for the most part – I do this fairly well myself so it’s not needed at all. The PT sounded more like something I’d like to do as I hate going to the gym but I would keep appointments, especially appointments I am paying for and it would be good to learn more about strength training and some of it would be covered by my health benefits.

I started thinking about all the things I have coming up. March 9, me and Leigh start the Learn to Run clinic at the Running Room which is three runs as week. I have three races between March and May and we also are going to start yoga in March as well. So…when I would I fit these PT sessions in? And, I still want to learn to swim, the session for January was cancelled due to low participation, so I’m hoping the March session is a go.

I have always believed that what gets me to my goal weight will also be what keeps me there. This means that if I get to my goal by doing some crazy schedule of a workout every night, I’ll have to keep that to maintain my weight. It’s not realistic and I know myself. 3-4 workouts a week is doable and sustainable.

After weighing everything, I realised I would like to do some PT sessions but only to the point that my benefits would cover it – I don’t want to spend money on that right now. My membership runs out February 24th so until then I will make the most of the gym – aquafit, zumba, treadmill, elliptical, weight machines etc. and also try and fit in some PT sessions. Once March hits, I will have enough activity to help get me fitter and smaller.

Guenther and CarbTripper have also got me curious about Crossfit, so that maybe something else to explore once I get my health issues sorted.

Spring Chick Challenge–Week 3 Results

2012-01-25T19:43:00.001-05:00

Start Weight	213.8
Week 1	213.4
Week 2	210.3
Week 3	210.3
Total Loss	3.5

Here’s my round up of my week (Thursday to Wednesday)

Weight

Stayed the same this week and although it is always a little disappointing not to see a lower number, I know I had a great week. The scale will catch up. It just means to keep going forward and not give up.

Food

Stayed on track and within points all 6/7 days. Ate clean and portion controlled meals cooked by me. I had one meal out at a Thai restaurant and made it fit into my day/week as well as a box of Junior Mints so I didn’t hit the 100% sugar free but I’m happy with it.

Fitness

Saturday – 30 min box fit class/30 min elliptical
Sunday – 20 min walk/35 min walk including half the Wentworth Stairs
Monday – Walked 20 min at lunch, it was pouring rain and I didn’t feel like sitting all afternoon in wet clothes!
Tuesday – Walked 30 minutes

Monday I woke up very stiff and sore. Abs and shoulders were tight and the most sore (that’s from the boxfit warm up and workout) as well as my calves from the jumprope and stairs. All day I was counting minutes until I could go home and soak in a hot bath. It helped tremendously. I was fine by Tuesday morning.

Fun

Met Leigh at Poonapalooza for a walk, signing up for the Learn To Run Clinic and coffee. Enjoyed the milder weather we had on the weekend. Had a really nice chat with Liam on our walk on Sunday afternoon. Loved the boxfit class.

Next Week

Keep tracking/counting/avoiding sugar
Fit in activity when I can
Mini Challenge – try a new activity – I’m thinking, Zumba maybe?

Health Stuff

Just as a follow up to last night’s post, thank you so much for all your support and good wishes. I’ve investigated a few things and have decided to cut out drinking caffeine – this means I may still indulge in chocolate now again, but I’m giving up coffee, black tea and my beloved Diet Pepsi and Coke Zero. Now I’ve done this before and gone up to 9 months so I know I can do it. I’m hoping it helps. I’m going to start tomorrow and hopefully the worst of the cravings will be gone by Monday when I return to work and more importantly, there’ll be a health benefit in a week or so.

I’m loving this challenge, I don’t think I ever made to the third week of any other challenge I tried before. This one just seems realistic and supportive rather than competitive. I’ve met some great new bloggers and gained some interesting insight.

To thine ownself be true.....

2012-01-24T12:56:00.002-05:00

This above all: to thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man.

~Source: WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE, Hamlet, act I, scene iii, lines 7880. Polonius is speaking to Laertes.

This quote is about self-respect.

This post is about self-respect.

I haven't felt well for months, probably since about mid-September. At first, it was a little annoying - my breath would catch every now and again, food would start to get stuck in my throat, I was tired more often than normal, my legs felt heavy, my back ached, ny hair seemed to be falling out an alarming rate, my skin was dry, red and flaky....minor things that I sort of felt I should just "get over". In September I was still in full running mode - 4 x a week and looking to go further.

All through October I struggled with running, I just didn't feel like running, it didn't make me feel good and would leave me feeling tired all the next day, sometimes with muscles aching more than I did when I first started. I didn't even have the energy to push farther and harder on the few times I felt like I wanted to try. My knee started to bother me, ranging from pain to minor aches. Then the first week of November I did my first 5K race, I pushed through it, even though it hurt physically and in the photos of me running, there are visible winces. After the race, I had a hard time walking for about 3 days and the pain would come and go, sometimes I could run, sometimes I could hardly walk. I rested, I iced, I took Advil, I pushed through - I wasn't sure what the right course of action was. Finally I learned I had torn a hamstring. A week's rest, two physio sessions and my knee/hamstring were good as new - I was lucky.

But the feeling of fatigue, achiness, breathing and other problems continued in varying degrees. I could have days where I felt fine and then days where I could hardly catch my breath and days that it felt like every single muscle in my body was screaming at me, days where concentrating on the simplest tasks was impossible and days where I was so tired, it was fight to just keep my eyes open all day. I would have days where I'd sleep 10-12 hours straight and wake up feeling like I hadn't slept in days. I know some of my friends and family thought it was in my head, maybe panic attacks or some other psychological problem.

I know I how I feel. I know what feels right and what doesn't. My normal might not necessarily be yours. I did see my Family Doctor during this time and she set up an appointment with a respitory specialist in February (this was back in December - gotta love the Ontario medical system!). By the first week of January I knew I couldn't wait that long and the respitory problems didn't address the other problems I am having.

Today I saw my endocrinologist. I love this woman. From the first appointment almost 10 years ago, she has never steered me wrong. She is both medically smart and people smart. She is compassionate and kind but tough and expects her patients do the work to get better. I usually see her twice a year, my last appointment was in November when I casually mentioned some of the issues to her. We tried a change in meds temporarily at that time, but it made no difference and some of the symptoms were so minor it was hard for me to even define them. As soon as she came out of her office and saw me today she said, "You don't look well, what's going on?"

I told her all the symptoms and the severity. She wrote everything down. She asked questions, she did an exam, she asked more questions. She went through my file, asked more questions.

Then she told me what she thinks it is and how we would treat it. Then she told me all the other things it might be and the tests required to rule them out.

She also told me all my bloodwork was normal - everything in the normal range and that on paper, I was perfectly healthy. My diabetes is better than optimal control. My thyroid appears to be functioning normally (with the level of meds I'm on). But she said, these are numbers are for about 90% of the population, there's always those people that fall within the numbers that aren't well. You're one of them. She said we just need to find out which of the numbers that looked right, weren't right for me.

So we're treating the horse right now, but going to look for the zebra, just in case. Either way, she said, "In a month - we'll have answers and if you're not already feeling better, we'll get you better." I'll let you know what the outcome is in a month or so...but none of the causes are life threatening or terribly serious - all are treatable and curable. I'm going to be fine.

So my whole point of telling you this....is that YOU know your body better than anyone. You know what your normal is. YOU know what feels right and what doesn't. Trust yourself, trust your instincts and respect yourself enough to take care of yourself and seek help.

I would not have let my spouse or my kids feel sick for three months and let them do nothing about it. Why did I think I wasn't worthy of the same self-respect or care?

Of boxing gloves and stairs, pulled beef, races and many other things….

2012-01-22T15:56:00.000-05:00

Mid week check in for me for the Spring Chick Challenge. My scale is showing a slight drop since last Wednesday so that is always nice to see. I know that scale has a mind of its own though, so it just means to keep doing what I’m doing and not slack off.
Eating has been good except for a minor run in with a box of Junior Mints (sugar!!). I counted it, tracked it and moved on. It fits into my weekly points and surprisingly, didn’t start a huge sugar craving fit. That was Thursday night and since then I’ve been back on track and have had no more sugar.
Lunches planned for this week are pulled beef (sirloin tip) and homemade coleslaw wrapped in a Weight Watchers tortilla, with an apple or yogurt on the side. I cooked the beef in the slow cooker on low for 6 hours and it just melts in my mouth. I made a spice rub of cumin, chili powder, chili flakes, ground garlic, salt, pepper and onion powder and marinated it overnight in the fridge, then put it in on a bed of sliced red and white onions in the slow cooker. Delicious!!! I am not a big meat eater, especially beef, but it IS really, really tender and flavourful when cooked this way.
I’ve been managing to fit in activity here and there. My week goes Thursday to Wednesday. Thursday night I came home, made dinner, didn’t even eat dinner, then crashed. I was very tired and needed the sleep. Friday night I went to the gym to talk prices for personal training and getting a full membership. I’m still on the fence with it so no decisions have been made.

Saturday – 30 min box fit class and 30 min elliptical
Sunday – Walked about 20 minutes or so with Leigh and then Liam I just walked from the apartment to the Wentworth stairs, down to the road (half the stairs) back up and then home, its just over 2km round trip. It is hard work walking on snow/ice. The stairs were wet but not icy so they weren't so bad. I found it so much easier this time than I did the last time I did them back in the early summer. So that was another 35 min of activity.

The boxfit class was fun, it was a short class as it was a 30 min free demo with my membership at the gym, but he said it was pretty much what they do every class, just shorter amount of reps. I now know what the “numbers” mean! I thought it would require more coordination and I would feel clumsy but I didn’t. It is a lot more cardio than I thought it would be. When I was standing outside the boxing studio waiting for my session to start, I was watching all these incredibly fit (and skinny) people do lunges, jumping jacks, chin ups and a bunch of stuff I don’t even know names for and I admit, I was more than a little intimidated, but the instructor was really nice and we just went at my pace. Even with a gym membership, the boxfit classes are an extra fee.
I signed up for a Running Clinic (Learn to Run) starting March 9th with blogger Leigh from Poonapalooza and we are going to do “The Chocolate Race” in Port Dalhousie as well as the Hazel 5k in Mississauga as the clinic’s graduation race. For someone who’s never run and hates exercise– Leigh is jumping in with both feet and not looking back. Way to go!
I spent a lot of time sorting through clothes, both mine and the boys’ and packing up stuff that doesn’t fit or isn’t worn anymore. I need to go through my shoes, I have about 50 pairs but I only wear about 10 on a regular basis, there’s no need to keep that many pairs of shoes…is there? Maybe? I am so bad about parting with my shoes! It’s not like I grow out of them!!! Anyway, it felt good to be a little more organized and have a little more space in my closet and for my (teeny, tiny, itsy bitsy) bedroom to be less cluttered.

Spring Chick Challenge–Week 2 Update

2012-01-18T20:11:00.001-05:00

Start Weight	213.8
Week 1	213.4
Week 2	210.3
Total Loss	3.5

What worked

Food. I did amazing with food this week, ate clean, portion control, counted and tracked. Except for a few bites of Bailey’s Cheesecake on Saturday night, I have not had any processed sugar in 11 days and feeling really good about it. I also ate twice but I made good choices and counted everything and made it fit into my week.

The mini challenge was to eat with my non dominant hand and I have to admit, it didn’t slow me down! I even mastered twirling spaghetti with my wrong hand. That’s dedication for you!

The recipe I made was Butternut Squash Macaroni Casserole from the Whole Foods app on my phone. The link will take you to the recipe on their website. If you go by their recipe, it makes 8 humongous portions that work out to 11 points each. I made 16 portions and counted it as 6 points each. Next time I’ll halve the recipe. I really liked it, it seems rich but it actually is very light tasting. I enjoyed it and my 15 year old loved it. To lighten up the fat and calories (and therefore WW Points Plus), I might substitute half the coconut milk with unsweetened almond milk. The coconut flavour is barely noticeable, its more of a sweetness that you taste.

I went to my WW meeting and stayed. The topic this week was Organization – one close to my heart. If my house is cluttered, my head is cluttered, if my bedroom is cluttered I can’t sleep, if my life is cluttered with ‘stuff’ – I have a hard time focusing. Organization is my life saver and my mantra.

What didn’t work

Running. I did walk every day at lunch that I didn’t have meetings or plans to meet a friend (I missed 2 days out of 5). I didn’t get to the gym or hiking. My hike was off because I slipped on ice on Saturday and bruised my knee. It seemed fine when I went to bed on Saturday night – a bit sore but nothing major. Sunday morning it was blue and swollen and hard to bend and although I probably could have gone at slow pace, I was more scared of falling again so I cancelled. I did walk 3k on Saturday and again on Monday. The knee is fine now, still bruised and a bit scraped up but not sore or swollen. The gym just does not motivate me at all and the thought of running on the treadmill does nothing to excite me.

When I was running four times a week with my friend Guenther, I couldn’t get my eating right – it was too much, too little, too irregular and now that I have my eating right, I can’t seem to get the exercise in sync.

Next Week’s Goals

Fitness

I had to think about this. I think as much as I would like to think I’ll run – in my heart I know I won’t…so I’m going to walk as much as I can on my lunch. It’s easy to bump the 30 minutes up to 45 minutes and also fit in longer walks on the weekend. Maybe if I take the pressure off trying to force myself to run – I’ll do it…reverse psychology? Who knows.

I never loved running and I’m not sure I ever will. I got this far by telling myself I didn’t have to like it, just do it….but that’s not working for me in the cold and dark of Winter.

Food

Of course I’ll keep tracking, staying within my WW Points Plus and eating clean 80% of the time. I achieve this part by making at least 19 of my 21 meals at home as well as 3 snacks each day and taking all my food to work with me. It also saves me a ton of money when I’m not buying food during the day – even healthy food adds up.

Fun

Spending time with family, friends and my books always makes me happy. So does cooking and new recipes. I’ll make at least one new recipe again this week.

Mini Challenge – No Sweets

I’m going to clarify that for me that means no processed sugar so I’m going to keep on riding that wagon. I do use maple syrup, raw honey or agave syrup for cooking and sweetener when needed.

Final thought

Just gotta keep goin’, cause givin’ up ain’t an option!

Week 2 Check In–Spring Chick Challenge

2012-01-15T15:35:00.001-05:00

I know for most of you on the challenge it is the end of week 2, but for me, it's the middle because my weigh in day is on Wednesday and I wanted to tie the challenge to that...so there you are :)

This week is going well for me so far and my scale is showing a definite drop in weight which I hope will show on Wednesday night's weigh in at WW. This week's weigh in topic was "Planning" and one of my favourites. I don't always stick to my plan but if I have no plan, I definitely do worse than having no plan at all.

I am meeting my weekly goals at about 80% and since I like the 80/20 rule I’m good with that. I am on day 9 of no processed sugar and feeling really good about my resolve and am even sleeping better and waking up less fatigued. I’m glad that the week 3 challenge will push me to keep that goal.

Although I believe in planning, I also believe in leaving room for life to get in the way. I have a full life and sometimes $hit happens.

I am not one of those people that is going to beat myself up because I missed a work out because I felt like meeting a friend, or reading a book, or playing Monopoly with son instead. I’m just not. This is my life, my journey and I have to do it in a way that meets my lifestyle and my needs, not yours, or yours or yours…or even yours.

Yes, I may be slower at losing weight than others, I may not spend as much time exercising or I may not eat all the right foods – but I am getting healthier, fitter and smaller at a pace that works for me, without overwhelming me, without making me give up, without driving me and everyone around me crazy.

If someone offered me a pill that I could be at my goal weight over night, I would take it in a heartbeat. If there were an easy way out, I would take it. But there isn’t, so the alternative is to put in the work and take each day as it comes and do the best I can with each day I have.

You don’t have to agree. You don’t have to like it. You have your journey and I wish you all the success you hope for.

In other news, I met a blogging friend for lunch on Friday and another blogger on Saturday for coffee and they are both so energetic, so enthusiastic and so inspiring that they completely lifted my spirits and renewed my resolve. I wish Tiffany lived closer so we could DO stuff together more often but no matter what is going on her life she always takes time to check on me and encourage me. She is my daily reality check. I think day to day support is really key for me and I’m lucky to have Tiffany and others who are always supportive and encouraging.

Spring Chick Challenge–Week 1 Update

2012-01-11T20:14:00.001-05:00

Start	213.8
Week 1	213.4
Total Loss	0.4

What worked

Taking all food to work (also saved money!)
Staying for a WW meeting
Getting out and hiking, treadmill running, walking at lunch time

What didn’t work

Didn’t exercise as much as I planned to
Didn’t stay as focused on the weekend as I need to

Biggest Obstacles

Time and Medical Issues

Solutions

Time – Plan and be organized!
Medical – Have endocrinologist appointment for Jan 24

Support

I am thankful for my blog and real life friends who cheer me on every day and never stop loving me.
I am thankful for Iain and Liam pitching in with the housework and meals so often.

Plans and Goals for Week 2 (Jan 12 – Jan 18)

Try one new recipe
Track everything and stay within points
Track activity points
Pack and take all food to work
Go to a WW meeting
Walk every day at lunch
Run (Treadmill or Outside) 3x – at least one 5k
Mini Challenge – eat with my left hand

Productive Weekend

2012-01-08T17:46:00.000-05:00

I accomplished a lot this weekend with a little help from my friends...(cue Beatles music).

Unfortunately, as much as I got done on the errands/life stuff, I failed on the healthy eating side. I did get in a 3k run on the treadmill and a 45 min walk outside at Crawford Lake which was awesome because although it was cold and very, very icy - it was glorious to be outside in the sunshine.

Wednesday will be my Week 1 weigh in for the Spring Chick Challenge and I had a sneak peak yesterday and let's say it was a wake up call to get my $hit together and start rocking this weight loss thing again. I have pretty much steadily (and thankfully very slowly) gained weight since July. A combination of reasons/causes but none of them are insurmountable with more work and effort. I am hoping by Wednesday at my WW meeting I will see a slightly better number than I did yesterday.

I have all my food packed for tomorrow at work, my bathing suit and stuff packed to go to Aquafit at 8pm tomorrow and my running shoes packed to go for a walk at lunch. I need more sunshine in the day to keep me sane. I leave for work when its dark and I come home when its dark, if I don't get out at lunch I don't see daylight at all because my area of the office is in the middle of the tower so there aren't any windows within in sight and if I walk past a window, there isn't a lot of light because of condos directly across from us. It amazed me today how much being out in the sunshine improved my outlook - and cured a nagging headache I've had for days.

Week 1 - Midweek Check In - Spring Chick Challenge or the Best Laid Plans of Mice and M’Enz

2012-01-05T18:55:00.001-05:00

Despite awesome planning - sticking to the plan isn't working so well.

Let's look at the positives from Monday to Thursday this week:

Eating - excellent, within points, clean, healthy food with the exception of one meal last night and I took all my own meals to work.
Coffee - 1 cup per day.
Water - about 2 L per day.
Tracking - every single bite.

What's not working:

Getting to the gym - some excuses, some legit reasons - either way - I need to make it work.
Getting to Weight Watchers to weigh in!

Some good stuff on the horizon though - the weather is looking up for the weekend and I have a hike planned for Sunday and a gym session Saturday morning. I'd like to get outside for a run at least one of those days as well. I had hoped to get outside for a run tomorrow night but my son and his girlfriend are coming over and I haven't seen Iain in over a week so I don't want to take time away from him.

I can go to WW first thing Saturday morning to weigh in and still manage to get all the other stuff done and hopefully next week, I’ll get to my Wednesday night meeting. Last night was the night of mishaps and I just couldn’t make it in time. (Actually my whole day yesterday could be a blog post – but I don’t want to rehash negative feelings so I’m letting it go…breathe Enza, just breathe!).

The biggest challenge for me is time - work, groceries, cooking, food prep, laundry, housework and spending what little time is left with the boys makes taking time to go running or go to the gym feel like I am taking time from them. My days are longer in the Winter, I get home a full hour (sometimes more) later than in the summer so it always feels like I am neglecting someone or something.

It all comes down to what's important to me, right?

Without a doubt - my boys are the most important aspect of my life right now and although I know in my head that being healthy and happy and around for a long time setting an example of good eating and exercise (finally!) is the best thing I can do for them and me...I hate that I only have an hour or so of real time with them every night.

It will work out - it always does. What seems insurmountable today seems ridiculously easy tomorrow.

New guy in blogland....

2012-01-04T20:34:00.000-05:00

My Fat Fight

This is my friend Guenther, who I started Couch25K with this past summer. He's on his own journey to health and weighing less. He has surpassed me in speed and distance in running and I am just a tiny bit proud that it was my text one night, "Want to do Couch25K with me?" that got him started running.

So go check out his blog and give him some support.

http://guentherball.blogspot.com/

Radical Ideas

2012-01-03T19:59:00.000-05:00

I had a great eating day. Stayed within my points, ate real food and drank water and only one coffee! I'm weaning myself off coffee, not because I think it's bad for me but because my friend Shelley pointed something out to me a month or so ago and I think she might be right. I put a lot cream in my coffee, like 4 of those little plastic creamer things in a 6 oz cup. One day, watching me hog all the cream on the table, she said, "Do you even like coffee or do you just like cream?" You know what...I think she might be right. I don't think I really like the taste of coffee, it always tastes bitter, hence putting in so much cream. I do love tea and drink it slowly and savour it. Coffee...I only finish half a cup and the rest goes cold....cause you know....cold cream made hot by coffee then gone cold is just gross!!

Anyway....off track. Today's problem. I packed my gym stuff last night, put it in the car this morning and stopped at the gym on my way home. Drove around the parking lot - several times - had to weave and squeeze past cars that were not actually in parking spots or in parking spots they created in the middle of the driving aisles. I parked in front of the door and looked in the window. Packed! People were actually standing around waiting for machines. I waited for 20 minutes and no parking spot came open. This is a big lot, it must hold over 200 cars. Other than park illegally on the street or invent my own spot - there was nothing I could do but leave. Even if I had found a parking spot or made one up - I hate crowds. You know how people have nightmares about drowning or falling or being trapped in a burning building? My nightmares are about crowds.

You know what? I was really disappointed. All day I had been thinking about running 3k on the treadmill in the women's only section of the gym. I had my playlist, my water bottle, I even bought new earbuds!

Now....it is most likely going to be like this right after work for the next few weeks. So..what do I do? Go later? I have to be in bed by 10 so I can wake up at 430 and be half human. If I go later, I don't think I'll be able to fall asleep in time, by the time I come home, shower and unwind - it's going to be late. Get up earlier? How much earlier would I need to get up? If I slept in my workout clothes - one advantage I can see to being single - and had my workclothes ready in a bag and woke up at 4:15 and immediately went to the gym, I could work out til 5, shower, brush my teeth, dry my hair at the gym and be on the road at 5:30 like I normally am....couldn't I? Is 15 minutes a huge difference? Most mornings I wake up about 20 minutes before the alarm goes off anyway....not that I GET UP...but I am awake. Do you think this doable? Not forever - but for a few weeks til the Resolutionists drop away?

This is a very radical thought for someone who hates mornings, the dark and the cold; for someone who loves, loves her down comforter and every moment of sleep when its dark outside.

Tomorrow night is Weigh In Night. Weight Watchers will also be full of Resolutionists. But as long as I get a seat for the meeting, I'll be happy.

Spring Chick Challenge–Week 1 and Intro

2012-01-02T15:29:00.001-05:00

I only ever signed up for one challenge in blogland and I didn’t see it through. I hate feeling like I have to live up to someone else’s idea of goals and expectations. This one, though, I like the premise behind it and I like the sense of community and support it will bring and I will give. And it will help Winter fly by if I have some sort of direction to follow.

The challenge starts today, here’s the website: Spring Chick Challenge or click on the image.

Commit to a NSV (non scale victory) to be assessed at the start and the conclusion of the challenge.

Goal: Run 5K twice a week (outside or treadmill)
Current: Run 5K about once a month

Commit to a set of nutrition parameters and track via MyFitnessPal or Sparkpeople or WW.

Goal: Track and stay within WWP+ every day/week (27 per day + 49 per week)
Current: Tracking and (mostly) staying within points.

Commit to a set of exercise parameters. These can be as loose or as flexible as you feel work for your personality, schedule, etc.

Goal: Run 2x a week either inside or treadmill. Do some kind of workout 5x a week
Current: Sporadic workouts – all or nothing – no consistency.

Commit to blogging at least twice weekly and 1 of those times must be you check in with a complete up date on your progress. All other blogs could include new insights, results of weekly challenges, or just letting others know how you are doing.

Goal: My check in day will be Wednesdays as that’s my WW Weigh-In day. I’ll blog at least 4x a week about progress and life in general.
Current: Sporadic blogging.

Commit to support... both giving and receiving. Check others blogs and comment as you feel motivated to do.

Goal: Following a whole bunch people doing the challenge!

Introduction

Name: Enz
Blog URL: the-4walls.blogspot.com
Email: downwardtrenz@gmail.com
Age: 44
Location: Hamilton, ON

Just trying to get fit and healthy to have more time to live and enjoy my life. Tired of being tired all the time.

Weekly Goal

This week I’m focusing on planning meals and exercise and sticking to it! As well as going to WW, weighing in and staying for the meeting. I’ve made a meal plan, have all the groceries in the house and am set for a great week ahead!

Weight Info

Start: 211 lbs
Goal for Challenge: 199 lbs

Life Goes Back to Normal

2012-01-02T14:26:00.001-05:00

Holidays are over. Life, real life, resumes tomorrow. I’ve had 9 days off and it was wonderful. It’s the most time I’ve had off with nothing to do in a very long time and I enjoyed it. I went to the gym, ran outside a couple of times, cooked, ate, cleaned, celebrated, watched TV and movies, hung out with my boys and with my friends – it was really nice and over all too soon.

Today is all about prepping so I can have a great week to lose the overindulgence bloat from the last two weeks and get back on to downward trenz in weight loss.

Groceries, food prep, meal planning and laundry and general tidying up were all done today. The boys are still off school for another week so I want to be able to come home from work and enjoy the time with them.

I’m also going to try something new for me. I’m going to pack my gym bag the night before and leave it in my car so when I get off the train after work I can go straight to the gym (which is on my way home), do a 30 min workout, either cardio or weights, then head home. I know once I get home after work and its cold and dark outside, I won’t want to go back out and will fight with myself and find a million excuses not to. I’m hoping this will help. I’ll keep you posted. I’m planning to do it on Tuesdays and Thursday which are my regular workout nights as well as Fridays.

What’s your opinion on Personal Training sessions? Of course, since having joined the gym, they are pushing personal training and although I can see the merit in it – I did two sessions with a PT who I really liked and the time flew by plus he pushed me to do things I wouldn’t have done on my own. I am not sure I can fit it into my budget, but I wanted to get some opinions on it first. So chime in, tell me your experiences.

Wednesday nights I’m going to back to my Weight Watchers meeting. Although I like Saturdays, it is always so crowded and it will be more so the first few weeks of the New Year and I really like the Wednesday night leader. Wednesday will also be my first official weigh-in in a month so that will be interesting! Whatever it is, its just a number along my path.

Oh..and the new series of Biggest Loser starts tomorrow night – it’s my only television trash and I’m not ashamed to admit it

So here’s my plan. I find I do so much better when I have a plan to stick to. If I can control Monday – Friday, I find I do so much better on the weekend when I have no real routine and I don’t plan meals most of the time. Monday isn’t filled in for this week as my week this week starts on Tuesday.

	Bfast	Lunch	Dinner	Snacks	Other
M
T	Protein Shake	Ham sandwich, salad greens w/oo and lj	homemade turkey/veg soup and pita crisps	banana apple	30 min run
W	Protein Shake	Cobb salad with oo/lj	Pita pizza	yogurt apple	WW Mtg Weigh In
T	Protein Shake	Ham sandwich banana	Roasted vegetables and pork loin	apple cheese string	30 min run
F	Protein Shake	turkey/veg soup cheese string	Pasta with roasted veg and chicken	apple yogurt	30 min elliptical and weights
S	Protein Shake		meat loaf and mashed potatoes		30 min run
S	Protein Shake		roast beef and vegetables		30 min ellipitcal and weights

3 C’s of Life

2012-01-01T22:30:00.001-05:00

I found this on pinterest.com and thought it was apt for the first day of the year.

I honestly believe that everything we do is a choice, some choices are more conscious than others, but each one is a choice. There are very few things in that are truly out of our control.

At some point, I made a series of choices that led to me being 250lbs and at some point I made a choice that I didn’t want to be that person anymore. Making a decision to change your life isn’t easy. There’s so much to think about. It’s scary. The unknown is always scary.

All I can talk about is my own experience, in the two years that I have been actively working towards a healthier body weight and a healthier lifestyle, I made new choices, taken some chances and made some changes. The thing is, I’m not there yet so I can’t stop. I have to keep reciting the Three C’s and more importantly – keep living them.

Happy New Year. I wish you all health and happiness for 2012.

Day 365– New Year

2011-12-31T23:35:00.000-05:00

The Resolution Run was today. The Universe loved me today because we had unseasonably high temperatures (+5), no wind, no snow and no rain. I could not have ordered better weather for the run.

It was a much bigger turnout than I expected and that panicked me a little as I really don't like crowds but once we started running and the runners pulled away and the walkers fell behind, Melissa and I were in our own little bubble most of the way.

I had decided I would start running and just see how I could do. My plan was to do 10's and 1's with Melissa for as long as I could and then walk the rest of the way.

Although I couldn't keep up with her, she was about 20 feet ahead of me almost the whole way - I did manage to keep the pace and ran 4 intervals of 10's and walked 3 intervals of 1's. It was hard. No lying - my breathing was all over the place and my legs felt like they had no momentum at all. But we did it.

Time was 43:04 which I am pretty pleased with considering how crappy I felt before and during and that I walked for 3 minutes. I loved my Garmin. It beeped every 500 metres like I wanted it too, and although I had set it for 10’s and 1’s, I don’t think it actually worked properly, so I need to recheck how that part works. I couldn’t figure out the backlight while I was running so I was using streetlights (when there were any) to read it as I went so I also need to look into that, and it also beeped when my pace went below the threshold I set. I really liked it. All in all, it was worth the investment!

Thanks Melissa and Tiffany for their encouragement, support and running with me this week. Love you guys.

Pics to follow.

Day 363, New Year

2011-12-29T16:13:00.001-05:00

The RUN

Pros

Shoes were awesome.
Tiffany was a great motivator and fun to run with (as much fun as I can have running..)
It was cold but there was no wind.
Legs held out for 4.75 km - no hamstring or knee issues.
Loved the Garmin.

Cons

My breathing made it really hard to get any kind of rhythym.
This was my first experience in the cold - the cold air was brutal.
It was a little icy and I was scared to death of slipping and reinjuring my tailbone.
I couldn't run more than 5 min at a time and I only did that 2 times I think so I walked way more than I wanted to.

I am not sure I will be able to keep up my running over the winter, I may have to do another running clinic/program in the Spring to get back up to 5k. I am worried about the Resolution Run and I think I am going to have to walk most, if not all, of it - even more so because it will be dark and I will not be able to see the ice, if there is any.

I'm trying to stay positive and just look at it as a point in time and that it will get better again.

Day 362, New Year

2011-12-28T16:27:00.000-05:00

Just about to head to the gym. I went yesterday and walked 45 minutes. Tonight is the third "assessment" with the Personal Trainer that I got for signing up at the gym. Tonight we are doing "arms". I hate my arms. I am not sure any amount work will make me love them, but the Personal Trainer is cute and funny and very encouraging, so its well worth the hour. I might actually learn something as well! You never know :)

While waiting for a friend at lunch today I popped into Factory Shoe and headed straight for their clearance rack and found the Asics I wanted before Christmas at the ridiculously low price of $64.99. I was so happy. They are comfy and fit perfectly and a pretty purple/silver colour to boot. Can't go wrong there. I loved my previous Asics and although I experimented with a couple of other brands, I have to admit my heart (and feet) belong to Asics.

I will wear them tomorrow for the first time on my run with my friend Tiffany tomorrow...we're going to do a practice 5k. I also picked up my race kit and Resolution Run jacket today and will wear it tomorrow and I will also use my new-to-me Garmin Forerunner 305 for the first time....actually a little psyched about this run tomorrow, for the first time in a long time, to be honest. Let's hope it goes well. Tiffany runs faster than I do and I don't want her to feel she has to hang back because of me (you listening Tiff...just go!!, I will see you at the end). I'm also a little worried about my breathing lately, I am going for asthma tests in a few weeks but in the meantime breathing is sometimes very difficult.

I'll let you know how it goes.

Day 330 - 361

2011-12-27T14:04:00.001-05:00

It's been a while!

Happy Almost New Year to all of you out there.

What have I been up to? Not a heck of a lot. The two weeks leading up to Christmas I was pretty much off the healthy living wagon, no tracking, not really counting anything, and exercise was very sporadic or irregular (like 4 days in a row, then nothing for a week - repeat). I have to admit the stress of the holidays always makes me forget everything but the cleaning, cooking, and shopping I have to do for that one day. Now that day is over I feel like life can go back to normal. I have the Resolution Run scheduled for New Year's Eve and I am fairly confident that I am not going to be able to run 5k straight, I haven't done it in over a month and the most I have run at one time was 4k a few weeks ago. In all fairness, I did go through three weeks of physio for strained hamstring muscles that definitely sidelined my running efforts and made me question whether someone my size should be running at all if its that much strain on my body.

I might just do intervals of 10/1 and see how that goes. I really don't enjoy running. I never seemed to get that runners high people talk about and I don't get a huge sense of accomplishment or have the urge to "go further or faster". I just do it because its a form of exercise that I can do. I am somewhat disappointed because I really wanted to like running and so many people LOVE it, that I almost feel like there's something wrong with me for not loving it. The people who do love it, keep telling me to stick with it and eventually I will love it. But the problem is that because I don't love it, I have very little motivation or inclination to stick with it. On top of that, I run slowly, so running with other people is very demotivating and doesn’t encourage me at all.

I did manage to get hold of a used (and very cheap) Garmin Forerunner 305 that I am hoping will at least keep me interested. I also have my gym membership til the end of February to get through the end off the Winter because I really don't like the cold, conversely, I don't like running on the treadmill either. I know...stop whinging and just get on with it. I am considering doing a 10K Running Room clinic in January just to keep me focused and actually doing something.

Weight wise - I gained about 5lbs when I was away for my birthday at the end of October that I haven't been able to shake and then I've gained 3 more over Christmas, so I am feeling bloated and heavy and gross. So its definitely time to get my $hit together and get back on track. Part of that is to make more an effort to fit blogging into my schedule.

I am off to read your blogs and see how you’re all doing!

Day 313 - 329, New Year

2011-11-27T12:12:00.001-05:00

I've not been writing much. I just feel like I have nothing to share lately. I'm still following Weight Watchers, I had a few weeks where I was only loosely following the program more out of boredom and "fed up ness" than anything else, but this week I'm back on track and feeling good about it again.

I hurt my knee a few weeks ago so my running hasn't been great since the last event I did at the beginning of November, but I did do a 4K event with my friend Melissa yesterday, we ran/walk the 4K and it was a lot of fun. I actually enjoyed this event more than the last one, I think because I had someone to do it with and it was a much smaller event, I didn't feel so claustrophobic with less people around and it was at Hamilton Bayfront Park which is where I normally run anyway, so I felt like I was on home turf.

About half way and knee feeling good!

Since I ran/walk, my time wasn't great, but my focus was on finishing with no pain in my knee and being able to run all the intervals - so it was a success to me. I don't know my chip time yet as the results aren't posted but I am sure it was pretty close to the gun time (37:52) as we were fairly close to the front - for the start anyway :)

Crossing the finish line.

I also joined Premier Fitness on their $90 for 90 days promotion. I hope this will get me through the worst of the winter weather since it is getting far too cold and dark to run outside at night. I've been twice and enjoyed it. I've tried the elliptical in the past and always felt like I was going to fall off, but it has been ok the last few days, a few moments of vertigo, but nothing major. And what a sweat I worked up! I really, really want a Garmin heart rate monitor now to help with running and also to know how many calories I'm actually burning. Maybe Santa (me) will bring me one for Christmas :) I'll see if I can fit it in my budget after the boys and other gifts are taken care of. I might also see if I can buy a used one.

I also did the stairmill to try and train better for the next CN Tower stair climb in April. I only did 10 minutes but I have 5 months to work up to 142 flights, so it's definitely a plan. When the weather permits, I will still run outside. I have an appointment for physio for my knee this week, but I had 6 days of complete rest and it felt so much better, so I'm hoping more rest and lower impact for another week or so will have it back to normal. They also have aquafit classes, which I used to love, so I'm going to try and make one class a week to throw in some variety and my running partner is going to show me how to use some weight machines so I can work on upper body strength.

I'm still on the hunt for the perfect headband! The great people at Bondi bands are sending me a band to review and one to giveaway, so I'll let you all know as soon as I receive them!

I'm also still in the market for new running shoes. I am convinced part of my knee problem is not having proper shoes for my weight and running style.

I'm registered for the Running Room's Resolution Run on New Year's Eve, again with my friend Melissa, and am hoping I can run the complete 5k by then again.

Weight wise, I'm bouncing between 198 and 205, but I'm hoping the increased cardio and being back on plan 100% will help me bust through 198 for the New Year...stay tuned !!!

Day 308-312, New Year

2011-11-10T20:50:00.001-05:00

Question for all my running friends?

Hat or headband and which specific type do you recommend?

I have shoulder length hair and bangs and although I put my hair in a pony tail, my bangs flap and sweat drips into my eyes - I hate it!!! So I need something to keep my hair out of my eyes and to stop sweat dripping into them, it really stings.

Advice please!!!

Day 270 - 307, New Year

2011-11-05T15:26:00.005-04:00

My first 5K event. Chip time was 43:29. It was a beautiful day by the lake and I raised $420 for a great cause.

Day 269, New Year

2011-09-26T18:24:00.001-04:00

Hey everyone,

I'm running my first 5K event on November 6 to support kids in Hamilton and in Haiti and would love your support. No pledge is too small to help kids.

http://hamiltonmarathon.ca/charities-supported/ - to find about the charities this run supports

http://www.onlineregistrations.ca/road2hopePledge/index.php?lname=Wall&fname=Vincenza - to make a pledge

Thanks,

Enz

Day 255–268, New Year

2011-09-25T19:27:00.001-04:00

Since my last post I’ve….

Run 5K two more times and took 2 min 40 seconds off my last time.
Had dinner at the Mandarin and decided it’s not worth the calories.
Bought these headphones and love them. (Jaybird F3)
Bought and wore size 16 jeans. Real size 16 not 16+.
Paid off the last of my consumer debt.
Decided to sign up for a 5K run in Hamilton on November 6.
Lost 3lbs and this is what 198 lbs looks like this.
Thinking about joining the YMCA and finally learning how to swim.
Stole this from Carbtripper and have it on my phone and my WW tracker.

Day 255, New Year

2011-09-15T21:32:00.001-04:00

Just a short post to let you all know that we finished the C25K program tonight. NIne weeks of 4 workouts (the plan calls for 3 a week but we repeated one workout each week) without missing one. We can consistently run 5k and we can easily run 30 min at a time. Over the last three weeks my pace has gone from more than ten minutes per km to about 8:30/km. My fastest pace per km is 7:19/km but I only maintained it for one kilometer.

Still not sure what the next plan is, but until I figure it out, I'm going to keep running 3-4 times a week and hiking at least once a week.

This Saturday, we're going to do 5k and push ourselves to get our best time yet. Later that day I'm hiking then going to Buffalo to go shopping. All my Winter/Fall clothes are too big and I am rewarding myself with bluetooth stereo headphones for running for completing the C25K program and my Swarovski crystal earrings for losing 50lbs. This weekend is all about me!!!

Will check in after weigh in on Saturday. The scale is not going to bring me down.

Day 247 - 254, New Year

2011-09-11T18:03:00.001-04:00

Another week gone by. And another week where I am "stuck" at the scale. I'm trying to focus on the positive things.

I can run 30 min straight pretty easily anytime.
I can run 5km if I really try.
My clothes are looser.
I sleep better.
I feel better.

But yet....I'm still carrying about an extra 60 lbs that needs to be gone.

7 weeks of bouncing the same 1.5 lbs is driving me crazy today. I did a ton of activity last week, and have been more active the last 8 weeks than I have been in about 15 years. I stay within my WW points and I eat about 80% clean.

This week, I'm going to try and add in more lean protein and add about 3 points a day from my Weekly Points. I try to save those for eating out or if I want something that's not in my usual eating plan, like ice cream or chocolate. But this week I'll intentionally use 3 extra day just for lean protein and see if this helps kick me off this plateau.

And, I'm going to try and up the activity. The days I don't run - I'm going to walk or do the Wentworth Stairs. Realistically, I know I can't keep up exercise 7 days a week forever and if I try to put that pressure on myself I'll just pack it all in. But for a week....just to try and shake things up, I can do it.

So...let's see if this works. I'll check back with you in a week or so.

On a good side - we have completed Week 8 of Couch to 5K. Last week coming up. I have been bouncing ideas about what to do about running when the 9 weeks is up - I haven't made a final decision yet.

Hope you are all having a great week!

Day 233 - 246, New Year

2011-09-04T18:16:00.001-04:00

Hi everyone!

Hope most of you are enjoying the long weekend. I am so glad I have an extra day to not get up at 430 a.m.

Some exciting news to tell you all....last night I ran 5km straight. No stopping, no walking. Just running. It took me just over 46 minutes. I have to admit when I got to about 3.5 km I started worry I wouldn't be able to make it and I slowed right down, but I finished and now I know I can do it, I'll aim to go a bit faster those last two kilometres next time.

That marked the end of Week 7 for Couch25K. 2 weeks to go. We start Week 8 tomorrow morning.

I have to come up with a plan to continue running after the program is over, and I've got some thoughts but haven't made a decision yet.

I've also been hiking three weekends in a row in different areas and am loving it. I am not an "outdoors girl". I hate bugs. I hate sleeping on the ground and I hate eating outside, but hiking is different, I love the trees, the colours, the sounds and the trails.

Weight. Well, the scale is not loving me. I am bouncing between 198 and 199.9 the last 7 weeks and am starting to get a bit fed up especially in light of all the activity I'm doing. I am just going to keep going on and try not to get discouraged. Whats the alternative?

Quitting and going back to 250 lbs. Not happening. No way.

Day 219 - 232, New Year

2011-08-21T18:37:00.000-04:00

Wow..its been a while. I knew I hadn't posted in awhile, but didn't realise how long it had been.

What have I been up to? Just life in general. I'm hanging onto Onederland by the skin of my teeth but I know I am doing all the right things so I'm just keeping the faith that the scale will catch up in it's own time, as it always does!

We have finished Week 5 of Couch to 5K and are starting Week 6 tonight. I can honestly tell you that when I finished running 20 minutes straight for the first time, it was one of the most empowering and self confidence boosting moments of my life. It was pretty awesome. I don't think I will ever be a speed runner, but the endurance is certainly coming along.

Yesterday I went on a 4km hike to Hilton Falls with my friend Tina and her dog, Sadie and then the same evening did C25K for another 3km. I felt pretty sore this morning, but a hot shower worked out the kinks and I think I am ready to start Week 6 tonight.

Foodwise, I'm still following Weight Watchers Points Plus program.

That's my world folks - hope yours is rocking :)

P.S. for any Blackberry users - do you know of a running app like Nike+ for the blackberry? One that uses the GPS to measure distance/speed etc? All suggestions appreciated.

Day 214 - 218, New Year

2011-08-06T22:44:00.001-04:00

It felt like a long, long week.

I was very tired this week and came down with a cold on Thursday morning. It all seemed to catch up to me this morning when I just felt like I'd been run over by a truck. A combination of lack of sleep, eating a too heavy restaurant meal last night, dehydration, fighting a cold and TOM conspired to make me just want to stay in bed.

I eventually got up and went and weighed in....up 1.3 lbs. I'm not too worried, like I said - TOM and a heavy restaurant meal the night before weigh in definitely contributed to the gain and I know it will be gone by next week.

Me and two friends, after WK1D1 of C25K

I napped this afternoon and although I had plans for Wk3D3 of C25K, I really didn't feel like doing it, but having a partner to do it with definitely makes a huge difference, so off we went. Week 3 is now done and Week 4 starts tomorrow night. Week 4 is new territory for me and involves total jogging time of 16 minutes out of 31 and also 5 minute intervals. Keep your fingers crossed for me! I have another friend who started Couch25K this week. Go Shelley!!!

Food wise, this past week was a carb fest - also normal this week of the month - and it was mostly whole wheat bread, which is a huge improvement over ice cream and cookies. With the exception of last night's meal at the Pickle Barrel, my meals were balanced and healthy.

Tomorrow is prep for the week ahead. Not sure what that will look like just yet. I'll keep you posted.

Day 212 - 213, New Year

2011-08-01T17:38:00.000-04:00

Feels like Sunday because of the holiday here in Ontario.

Tomorrow is back to work, I've thoroughly enjoyed three days off, even though they were busy and a little tiring.

My running partner, Guenther, and I tackled Week 3, Day 1 of Couch to 5K yesterday and did really well, he is struggling with some knee problems but he is determined to push through. The program for week three is:

5 minute warm up walk
Jog 90 seconds
Walk 90 seconds
Jog 3 minutes
Walk 3 minutes
Jog 90 seconds
Walk 90 seconds
Jog 3 minutes
Walk 3 minutes
5 minute cool down walk

We'll do Day 2 tomorrow and hopefully will do a little better in time and distance.

I have all my food prepped for the work week ahead.

Breakfasts - 1 cup milk, 1 package Carnation Instant Breakfast
Lunches - homemade vegetable chili, 1 oz skim mozzarella
Snacks - Royal Gala apples

Looking forward to another successful week on plan. How about you? How are you going to rock this week?

Day 208 - 211, New Year

2011-07-30T10:05:00.000-04:00

Happy Long Weekend to my Ontario friends!

I have a busy weekend planned, but it's all good.

Weigh in today was another 1.9 lbs down so I'm happy and feel like I have my feet firmly planted in Onederland. Although I was thrilled to bits last week at hitting 199.9 - weighing in this week, it just felt a little too close for comfort and I was terrified I might go up just a smidge and I would get kicked off the island.

But I didn't...so all good.

Couch to 5K is going well. We just wrapped up Week 2 and Week 3 starts tomorrow. Week 3 jumps to 3 min of running...and although I have done it before, I have this nagging doubt that I might not be able to do it again. Both our run and walking speeds are increasing and it is very motivating to have someone to do this with, this time around.

That's all from me today. Have a great weekend everyone!!!

Day 205-207, New Year

2011-07-23T22:18:00.001-04:00

So here’s my proper post about Onederland and reaching 50 lbs lost (50.1 to be exact….)

I went into the weigh in Saturday morning feeling “fat”, you know when you have those mornings? You wake up and your skin feels tight, your stomach looks bigger than usual and you are sure you must have eaten an elephant in your sleep? That’s how I felt.

When I went up to the scale, the receptionist who is also my regular meeting leader, asked how my week was and I said, “Ok” and she said, “Just ok?” I nodded. Then she said, “Your OK is better than most people’s good – you lost 3.5 lbs!” I did the mental math and just about screamed! I said, “So that’s 199.9?” and she nodded and smiled. Then I told her it was also 50 lbs since my on line start date and you know what she did? She scratched out my start as 235.4 and put 250 and updated my loss from 35.5 to 50.1 and said I should stay for the meeting and celebrate and get my 50 lb charm…so I did. It was really an amazing moment.

I really didn’t think it would be this week, I thought by the end of August I would be in Onederland. It was totally unexpected. I had planned that I would ask them to take a picture of the scale read out for me, but in my surprise this morning I completely forgot.

Here’s my key ring.

And here is me in size 22 pants now.

Day 199–204, New Year (click on pic to enlarge)

2011-07-23T15:31:00.000-04:00

Day 198, New Year

2011-07-17T15:01:00.001-04:00

Sunday has always been the first day of the week in my mind. So it's the perfect day to prep for the week ahead. That's what I did last Sunday and it resulted in a perfect-eating week and a not-obsessing-about-food-all-the-time week which made a pleasant change. It was easy to just grab and go each morning and not think about food again until supper time. This week, I'm doing that again.

Breakfasts are super easy, 1 cup 1% milk and 1 pkg NSA Instant Carnation Breakfast. I mix it up the night before and then just shake it in the morning when I'm ready to drink it.

Last week's lunches were my cereal/yogurt mix, this week it's falafels in a pita. 4 falafel balls, 1/2 whole wheat pita, chopped onions and tomatoes and 1 tbsp of PC Blue Menu Tzatziki Dip.

Snacks will be apples again. Royal Gala are my favourite. Aren't apples the most perfect snack food? They're portable, they last a long time, they are crispy and sweet, about 80 calories each and high fibre, low sugar.

And I'm good to go. The week is going to be a breeze for staying on plan. The nice thing about this is that I know how many points I'll use all day and there are plenty left over for dinner so I can have just about anything and make it fit, as well I'll have my 49 weekly points.

On the exercise front, some of you may remember I started C25K back in April, I got as far as Week 3 (I did it twice), then my self discipline fell by the wayside. Good news! A friend of mine wants to start it and he lives just a few blocks from me so it will work out well for scheduling. The other good thing is that he is very, very competitive and stubborn and he won't want to back down or skip a run, so this will keep me motivated as well because I won't want to be the one that lets us down either. Tonight's our first run! We're starting back at Week 1. He is also out of shape and wants to lose weight so he has lots of motivation to be active.

Wishing you all a great week :)

Update: Week 1, Day 1.

Day 195 - 197, New Year

2011-07-16T11:37:00.002-04:00

Weigh in today: 2.1 lbs down.

Day 192 - 194, New Year

2011-07-13T19:16:00.000-04:00

Just a bunch of random thoughts....

1. My newest favourite lunch is this:

1 cup of Kashi Almond Crunch (thanks Shelley!)
1/2 cup of President's Choice Non Fat Greek Yogurt
1 tsp chia seeds
1 tsp mini chocolate chips
1 tsp of maple syrup

Mix together and enjoy. So crunchy, so creamy...I don't think I'll ever get tired of it.

2. I took off my wedding ring. Well to be more accurate, it keeps falling off and I really don't want to lose it. I am not sure how I feel about it...yet. I put on my "new" ring, the one I bought last summer, but it's also too big...so now my wedding ring finger is naked and yes, it feels strange.

3. I am seriously addicted to "Drop Dead Diva"...I watched season 1 and 2 in one weekend and am all caught up with season 3...can't they play an episode every day? And.....Jane looks eerily like my friend Melissa, who is actually more beautiful than Jane - but still looks so much like her.

4. I want to go back and read all the Harry Potter books before I see the movie.

Day 185 - 191, New Year

2011-07-10T15:55:00.000-04:00

Just checking in.

Since my last weigh in, I've had a lot of take out food and eating out and not much exercise. Life happens sometimes. This ended up with a 1.1 lb gain...and I'm ok with it. I did my best to control portions and make the best choices I could with what was on offer. Sometimes, it just works out that way. It'll be gone soon enough.

The last few days I've been back on track, I went to the Toronto Outdoor Art Exhibit on Friday and walked around for 2 hours, I prepped and packed all my lunches for next week and have my breakfasts ready to grab and go. Snacks will be apples. It will be a good week.

Some of you know my husband and I separated last year after 22 years of marriage. This past Friday night is the first time I've felt lonely. My boys were away, I was at the Art Exhibit waiting for my friends to join me and I just sat at the fountain at Nathan Philips Square people watching. So many couples, of all ages and description, holding hands and laughing and talking. Parents with small children on their shoulders or in their arms. All of a sudden I felt really sad. My boys are growing up and there isn't anyone to hold hands with. It made me think about what I want for the rest of my life.

Don't worry, I'm not brooding and a good nights sleep and I was pretty much over it :) But it was an interesting introspection.

Day 177 - 184, New Year

2011-07-03T21:35:00.000-04:00

It's been a whirlwind two weeks - my oldest son turned 17 and my youngest graduated from grade 8 and will be in High School in September...honestly, some days it feels like I was just 17...where do the years go?

I weighed 204.4 at my last weigh in and this reminded me that the last time I weighed this low, Liam (my now 14 yr old) was 2 years old.

It's been a long, uphill road to go downhill in weight.

The long weekend was nice, relaxing, family time and no stress. I managed to eat really well all week up until today, but am hoping it will balance out with the rest of the week.

Thank you all for your comments on my last post (the photos) it made me smile to read each of your comments and brightened my day. It validates for me that the most important thing about this journey is persistence. I know I can't be perfect forever, but I know I can always keep going and I hope that that is what will get me to goal and keep me there.

Have any of you ever broken your toe? The middle toe on my right foot is swollen and bruised and very sore and hurts if I put weight on my foot a certain way - running is excruciating, going up and down stairs is extremely painful. At first I thought I broke it when I stubbed it against a cart a week or so ago, but then a few days later it seemed a lot better, then yesterday it got worse again. I don't think there's anything that can be done for a broken toe except let it heal, right? Maybe tape it to the next toe to stabilize it? But it's really swollen right now so I don't even think that would be a good idea. If it's not noticeably improved by tomorrow I'll try and go by a walk in clinic just to get it checked out...but I really don't think there's any treatment. Has this happened to any of you?

I hope you had a wonderful Canada Day and Happy 4th Of July to my American friends.


Den, Iain, Liam & Enz - Liam's Grade 8 Grad.

Day 172 - 176, New Year

2011-06-25T23:48:00.003-04:00

September 2008 250+ lbs (size 24 dress)	June 2011 209 lbs (size 14/16 dress)

Day 171, New Year

2011-06-20T20:08:00.000-04:00

I just decided. I'm going to write another post. Ya know why?

Cause life really does NOT suck right now. The damn scale sucks. I am feeling good most of the time, eating well, exercising when I can fit it in and having fun with friends and family. Work is tolerable, it's SUMMER in the best place in the world to live (no...not Hamilton - I still consider Toronto home) and I am HAPPY. Honestly, I am happier than I have been in such a long time. There are days I forget that. Tonight I'm choosing to remember it.

My summer has gotten off to a rocking start with a 5K walk, drinks and dinner on a lovely downtown patio with a really cute and amusing guy, gorgeous 3" inch heels that I can walk in and not topple over because my stomach is throwing off my balance, cute summer dresses that show off my not - so - fat - anymore legs, a girls' night with some amazing ladies in a backyard patio, my youngest son's middle school grad is in two days and I have to tell you, that boy is so handsome in a suit, friends that call or email me every single day to tell me they love me and believe in me.

And despite the scale not loving me lately - I went shopping with a friend in Buffalo and followed her around Banana Republic and tried on an XL top and it fit comfortably. And when I see pictures of me taken in the last few weeks, I look "normal". Don't get me wrong, at 209 lbs and only 5' tall, I have about 70 lbs to lose and am still morbidly obese but I don't look HUGE standing next to normal size people....just big...does that make sense?

I am going to post pics from my son's grad later this week. I know when I put them next to the pics taken at my sister's wedding just before I started this weight loss journey, I will see the difference and realise that although I've got a long, long way to go, I've also come a long way.

After talking to my friend Tiffany, I also decided to get something special for my 50 lbs lost goal which will be in 9.2 more pounds. I will get there. I would prefer sooner rather than later...but when I do get there - I'm thinking I want something special to wear every day that will be an anchor for me to remind me. I was looking at Swarovski crystal jewellery and although a necklace was my first choice, I really want to save that for when I reach goal. So maybe stud earrings? I can wear them all the time and they are reasonably priced and beautiful and I will see them every time I brush my teeth or put on make up or do my hair and they are easy to touch when I need to "anchor" myself.

I'll revisit this thought in 9.2 lbs.

Day 165 - 171, New Year

2011-06-20T19:38:00.000-04:00

Hey there everyone...

Yeah I'm still floating around. Nothing new to report. Weight loss is going very, very, very S...L...O...W for me right now.

In other news - I received the Clean Eating cookbook I won awhile back from Patty over at 135 x 12 and I am psyched to start using it, it has 4 weeks of clean eating menus. What I love, love, love about Clean Eating magazine is their philosphy - changing your life, one meal at a time. It's really that simple.

As I go along, I'll share some recipes.

Thank you all for hanging in with me and a huge shout out to my two main supporters who never, ever let me give up - Shelley and Tiffany. Love you guys :)

Day 154 - 164, New Year

2011-06-13T18:29:00.000-04:00

Can anyone see the yoyo in the sidebar to the left?
Yeah, me too.

Got nothing to say today, just trying to make this work.

Did the WW 5K on Sunday with my friends Shelley, Heather and Michele, it was a beautiful morning for a walk.

More...later.

Off to catch up with y'all.

Day 153, New Year

2011-06-02T21:33:00.000-04:00

A is for Apple, what’s your favorite variety?Royal Gala.
B: is for Bread, regardless of nutrition, calories, or whole grains what is your favorite type to have a nice big piece of?
Italian bread.
C: is for Cereal what is your favorite kind currently (just one!)Don't like cereal.
D: is for Doughnuts, you might not currently be eating them but what kind do you fancy?Krispy Kreme, creme filled.
E: is for Eggs, how would you like yours prepared?Not fond of eggs, but if I have to eat one - soft boiled.
F: is for Fat Free, what is your favorite fat free product?Fat Free Cool Whip
G: is for Groceries, where do you purchase yours at?Fortinos, Loblaws, No Frills - whichever store has the best sales that week.
H: is for Hot Beverages, what is your favorite hot drink?Hot chocolate.
I: is for Ice Cream, pick a favorite flavor and add a fun topping.
Chocolate with peanut butter melted on top.
J: is for Jams or Jellies, do you eat them, and if so what kind and flavor?Raspberry jam on toast.
K: is for Kashi, name your favorite Kashi product?
None ;(
L: is for Lunch, what was yours today?Wendy's Pico Snack Wrap and Baked Potato?
M: is for microwave, what is your favorite microwave meal/snack?Vitatop with sugar free hot fudge sauce
N: is for nutrients, do you like carbs, fats, or proteins best?Carbs...all the way.
O: is for oil, what kind do you like to use?Olive oil.
P: is for protein, how do you get yours?Chicken mostly.
Q: is for Quaker, how do you like your oats?In cookies.
R: is for roasting, what is your favorite thing to roast?Chicken rubbed with olive oil.
S: is for sandwich, what’s your favorite kind?Grilled vegetables.
T: is for travel, how do you handle eating while traveling?Badly..
U: is for unique, what is one of your weirdest food combos?Can't think of any.....
V: is for vitamins, what kind do you take?
C, D and E
W: is for wasabi, yay or nay?Nay.
X: is for XRAY. if we xrayed your belly right now, what food would we see?
Chicken quesadilla, hummus and pita chips.
Y: is for youth, what food reminds you of your childhood?Turkey Christmas dinners and apple pie.
Z: is for zucchini, how do you prepare it?Brushed with olive oil and grilled.

Day 147 - 152, New Year

2011-06-01T19:49:00.000-04:00

Weigh in tonight was up 0.2 lbs. I have to admit, today I just don't care. I am tired and have been feeling unwell for about a week and to be honest, weight loss hasn't been foremost in my mind. I know it needs to be. The only way I ever succeed and do well is when I live, breathe, eat and sleep in weight loss mode. It sucks...but it's the truth. The second I let my guard down, for whatever reason, I start to regain. Even though I know this in my head and I have long ago accepted I will always, for the rest of my life, have to watch what I eat - there are times that other things take over the brain space and the emotional energy required to maintain a healthy lifestyle.

So...I am feeling much better this afternoon than I have the last 4-5 days so hopefully I am on the road to recovery and can get back into 100% full tilt weight loss mode frame of mind and body. This won't work if I don't.

I am going to the Toronto Zoo on Sunday - one of my all time favourite places - so there will be lots of walking and it will be a good mental break from the rest of my life. Funnily enough, I am not a big "animal" person...but I love the Zoo.

That's all I got tonight folks :)

Oh...if you'd like to recieve my witty, insightful and oh so inspiring posts by email rather than come to blogger, sign up for an email feed in the sidebar on the left.

Day 139 - 146, New Year

2011-05-26T22:05:00.001-04:00

Went and weighed in last night, I didn't think I'd be able to make my regular weigh in, but I did. While I was waiting to weigh in - and I waited a while longer because I wanted a different receptionist from last week - I opened my WW card - not my little one - the big one they keep. Our leader always pulls them and gives them to us while we're waiting in line. So...I opened it and started running down the list of weigh ins.

Whoa.

I am bad at math, seriously I suck at it. But even I could see there were some major problems between the record and my own card (both filled out by the receptionist at weigh in). In some places the weights recorded for the same date didn't even match each other. One week my card said I had lost 0.4, yet the record showed a loss of 2.4.

And...all the mistakes were in the same handwriting - the receptionist I saw last week. I pointed it out to my favourite receptionist and my leader last night and they were both surprised and embarassed. They said I should ask to have the display moved if I can't see it, that I should always see it unless I chose not to. They said I can check the record any time I like. So..I weighed in and we took yesterday's weight and subtracted it from my starting weight and just ignored the mess in the middle. I have no idea whether I lost or gained from last week because it was so f-ed up....we're going with I lost 0.8 if I really weighed 210 last week, which we don't know for sure because the record showed 210.6.....yeah go figure. Anyway my total loss is 26.2 lbs and I'm going to check that scale and the math every week I go from now on!

Just a quick note to those of you that are Facebook friends - I deactivated my account for a bit so please don't think I defriended you!

Day 138, New Year

2011-05-18T20:12:00.000-04:00

I need y'all talk me down off a ledge, or maybe the observation deck of the CN Tower. Especially you Anne (CarbTripper)!!!.

I did a week of the Dukan Diet - very low carb - in fact, low fat with low carb. I ate all my points every day but didn't use any of my extra points, I didn't exercise much, and I did drink a ton of water every day.

I went to weigh in tonight. The receptionist/weigh in woman says "You gained 3lbs this week, do you know what happenened?" Seriously, I think it took me 10 seconds to find my voice.

I told her it was impossible, she did that sneer, "Well dear, that's what the scale says". Seriously, I was ready to rip the fucking scale off the shelf. I didn't actually look at the display myself. The way it's positioned makes it hard to see at my height, I need to look over a stack of magazines to see it and I can't while I'm standing on it.

I left and called my friend Shelley and after she listened to me recover from my not-so-mini breakdown, I indulged in retail therapy. I needed a hair straightener for my new cut and I found some really cool belts at Talize. Then I picked up dinner - and while sitting in the drive-through line in the pouring fucking rain (did I mention it is STILL raining????), I looked at my weigh in card.

Can you see this? What the receptionist wrote down? Last week I weighed 207.8. She writes this week's weight as 210. Then says I gained 3, and my total loss is 28.2. No way of working that math makes sense...so now I'm wondering if 210 is even right because it makes no sense at all, my own scale says I lost 4 lbs and my doctors scale last night showed a loss of 3 lbs. I know it will all work itself out next week - when I will 1. not go to that receptionist and 2. look at the scale myself.

Day 137, New Year

2011-05-17T20:05:00.000-04:00

You know what losing almost 30 lbs gets me?

Let me share...

3" off my waist
A1C = 0.058
Cholesterol in the normal range

Probably a bunch of other stuff...but that's good for now :)

Day 136, New Year

2011-05-16T10:14:00.001-04:00

"In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit."— Albert Schweitzer

I have nothing new or inspirational to say today, but I wanted to take a minute and give a shout out to some awesome people who encourage me when I’m down, push me when I’m lazy and love me all the time.

Melissa you inspire by your example to always push yourself and demand the best you can be.

Shelley your sense of humour and your unconditional friendship mean the world to me and make my days lighter.

Tiffany your constant support and common sense keep me going every day and remind me that quitting is not an option.

Karen your unwavering belief in my confidence and my abilities makes me believe in myself.

Andrew you make me face the things I don’t want to face, and I am always stronger for it.

And of course, all my friends in the Blogosphere that I’ve met in real life or just on line who make me laugh, smile, cry and most of all...THINK and DO.

At the end of the day, individually, we have to put in the work to get to our goals. This is one goal that really isn’t a team effort – only one person has the control - but having people who understand and are supportive makes the work easier.

Thank you!

Day 135, New Year

2011-05-15T19:59:00.001-04:00

Today is day 5 of the Dukan Diet. You know what...the texture of chicken is really bothering me this week, maybe it's because it's not paired with crunchy vegetables or smooth potatoes or rice? I don't know, I just had some roasted chicken breast and literally had to gag it down. The same thing happened on Friday. Maybe I need a break from chicken? Although I am holding strong with the Attack Phase, I will be so glad to see these 7 days over.

I set up my Quantum scale last night and used it this morning for the first time. I think it will be great for when I get to maintenance because then all I will care about it staying within two pounds of my goal weight. But for losing weight, I think I like seeing the number - I will use it for the week and let you know my final thoughts and then do the giveaway - so stay tuned! The only downside that comes to mind immediately is that only one person can use it at a time because it stores the starting weight and then calculates all the other weights based on that.

Today was another uneventful day - it poured rain. Memo to Mother Nature: WTF???? So no run. I am going to have suck it up tomorrow if it rains again - I can't keep letting Mother Nature win this game.

No plans for this coming week. Work, home...repeat x 5. I've had a busy social life the last few weeks and I think I will welcome coming home every night and just chilling.

I lost my wedding ring today. It flew off my hand when I brushed my bangs away from my face and it took me a good 5 minutes outside to find where it had rolled to (under a Tim Horton's recycling / garbage bin). I was in an absolute panic and was overjoyed when I found it. Probably I should stop wearing it - it's clearly too big and I've been separated a year so it doesn't make sense to have it resized and keep wearing it...does it? I'm still wearing it, I just can't seem to go through the motion of pulling it off my finger and putting it away. I even have another ring to wear in it's place that I bought last summer - it's still sitting in it's little velvet box in my dresser. Don't get me wrong - I have no illusions, delusions, fantasies or hopes that Den and I will reconcile. I am not sure what the ring is symbolising to me at this point and why I don't want to take it off.

Day 131- 134, New Year

2011-05-14T15:41:00.000-04:00

Day 4 of the Dukan diet. This low-carb diet from Dr. Pierre Dukan from France is the newest "diet craze" in the low carb world. I read his book and found that it is even more stringent and restrictive than Atkins, but I decided to do the Attack Phase for 7 days to break my carb-cravings. This is the fourth day and I'm still going strong. I am not craving sugar or sweets at all. What I do "miss" is the texture of crunchy and crispy, so today I had some pickles on my bunless hamburger to get a crunchy mouth feel.

I don't think I could do even Phase 2 of the Dukan Diet for very long, it's still very restrictive, but I know after these 7 days I'll go back to my normal way of eating and I will feel better and I'll be able to stick with it again until I push myself back into carb overload. Hopefully these episodes will get fewer and farther between. I think since I started WW back in December 2010, it's happened 4 times and the first three times I was able to get myself back on track within a few days without drastic measures - this time it was dragging into 3 weeks of carb frenzy and I knew I had to stop it...hence trying the Dukan Diet.

It is rainy and overcast in Hamilton today. I was hoping to get back into running - but really, the rain does not inspire me!! And I pulled a muscle in my shoulder yesterday that is very very painful and even the jostling from walking is sending pain down my arm. Tomorrow it should be a lot better and maybe I can convince myself to brave the rain.

My Quantum Scale finally arrived! I haven't set it up yet, but will do so and let you know what I think of it very soon. Thank you Charlie at Quantum Scale for getting it all sorted out eventually.

A few weeks ago I ordered a GymBoss to help me with interval running. I also need to set that up and put it into use.

All in all, life is good right now. Boys are doing well, work is steady, friends are awesome and I feel blessed. There's just enough drama in my life to stop me from being bored but not so much that I feel overwhelmed by it all.

Day 130, New Year

2011-05-10T13:50:00.000-04:00

All day Sunday and yesterday I had a headache that would not quit. Last night I was up all night with fever then chills then fever then...you get the idea. I took some Tylenol and slept for 4 hours straight and when I woke up I felt semi-human. No fever, no chills and no headache. I had to go get bloodwork done today for my endocrinologist appointment next week so I took some more Tyelonol and off I went. Bloodwork done.

Then because I'm home today and I have a lot of running around to do tomorrow night I decided I would go weigh in. I was absolutely dreading it.

Can I get a drumroll?

3.3 lbs down. Not only did I hit the 25 lbs mark, I blew past it. And I got my cute little charm for my keyring.

This is the lowest weight I've been since I started back in January of 2009. My previous lowest was last May when I briefly hit 209.4 and stayed there for all of a week. Next goal is 36lbs lost and I need 8.4 lbs to get there.

I forgot to mention yesterday that I won a cookbook from Patty over at 135 by 12. Thanks Patty! I'm looking forward to it. Clean Eating is my favourite magazine and I'm hoping this cookbook will give me some more new ideas. I like their philosophy of making changes one meal at a time.

That's all I got for now folks...hope all of you have as beautiful weather as we do here in the Toronto/Hamilton area.

Day 125 - 129, New Year

2011-05-09T20:18:00.000-04:00

I've been fighting a headache all day. I think it's a combination of lack of sleep and eating too many carbs and not eating regularly over the last three days.

My week last week was crazy busy at work and then I went out Thursday night to see Ghost Stories and to a wonderful Italian bistro in downtown Toronto (Terroni) with a friend. We had a great night and laughed so much. He drove me back to my car in Aldershot so I didn't have to wait for the train so that made it a somewhat earlier night, but getting home at 11 p.m. when the alarm goes off at 430 a.m. is still late!! Although the food was delicious that night, it was a lot of processed meat and white pasta and not much protein and fresh vegetables.

Saturday I was up bright and early to go to Buffalo with two other friends and since neither of them drive, that was also a long day - which saw me driving her back to Toronto and then back home arriving home around midnight. A late phone call that I didn't want to deal with, made my night even later...so I ended up sleeping late Sunday morning which totally threw me off my game and left me with a splitting headache. Saturday's meals consisted of eating out all day. And Sunday I just grazed on whatever took my fancy. Today was not much better, but I did make a pot of homemade stew for supper and finally had some meat and vegetables!

I'm rambling, I know.

I downloaded The Dukan Diet for my iPhone. It's basically a low-carb diet and I know that low-carb (as in processed carbs) is the best for my body and my weight loss and when I lose sight of that and start letting processed carbs creep back in - I not only feel like crap, but my skin looks dry and I get headaches. I'm going to do the Attack Phase for 7 days to detox from the crappy carbs and then go back to "my" normal eating plan which is very limited processed carbs and lots of non-starchy vegetables and 2 pieces of fruit a day. I don't think I can sustain no pasta, rice, bread, sugar forever, but I can certainly do it for 7 days to get myself back on track.

Weigh in on Wednesday night and I have no idea what to expect. I have found myself obsessing over reaching the 25lb mark which is so dumb because from my all time high weight I am now at almost 40lbs but since joining WW in December, I've been fighting this number for the last month and want to win! I have to keep reminding myself it's not about a number - its about how I feel, look and how healthy I am.

Day 122 - 124, New Year

2011-05-04T19:22:00.002-04:00

"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit."
~ Aristotle

Keep going, keep making good choices, keep exercising. It will work. This is my mantra this week.

1.4 lbs down for a total of 24.3 lbs. This week was better than the last; I tracked, I ate well, I did 30 min or more of some kind of activity 5/7 days. Eventually, the scale has to catch up.

Speaking of - I haven't heard anything else about my Quantum Scale. And if I do get mine, I am a little concerned about doing a giveaway and am worried the lucky winner won't actually be lucking in receiving it. I'll keep you posted.

Day 121, New Year

2011-05-01T20:09:00.000-04:00

A completely unproductive weekend. I had plans to do so much "stuff" and ended up doing the absolute bare minimum. But you know what? It was nice to just do nothing, to have no real plans, to just go with the flow and chill for a day or two.

Of course, reality will set in tomorrow night when I have to do laundry and clean the bathroom...but for tonight - that stuff can wait.

I had fully planned to get back into C25K tonight but it started raining around 4 p.m. and was even freezing rain for a bit...and although I did three days last week in the rain and wind - I am just not up to it tonight.

I had a nice visit with my friend Shelley at Starbucks and we laughed - well she laughed at me and a situation that I've put myself into - a lot. I find I am laughing more and more these days and that's a good thing right?

Eating wise, this weekend has been right on track and I'm all set for the week ahead. Hopefully Wednesday will see me kicking those 1.5 pounds to the curb...and with any luck, just a little more. We'll see. One day at a time, right?

Day 119 - 120, New Year

2011-04-30T18:28:00.001-04:00

It is a beautiful Saturday in my little neighbourhood....it's about time after the all the rain and high winds we had all week.

Last night I went with some friends to see Calendar Girls at the The Royal Alexandra Theatre in downtown Toronto. The show was amazing...starring one of my all-time favourite Canadian actors, Fiona Reid. We were in the Orchestra section, tenth row, centre. The cast was talented and the story was bittersweet, we laughed and cried.

Before the show we had dinner at Fred's Not Here on King Street in the theatre district. Take my word for it, there is nothing point friendly on their menu!!! I had the Jump-up Spicy Vegetable Soup, 6-hour oven Slow Roasted Alberta “high river” region certified angus beef brisket w/ grilled portobello spinach risotto and the dark chocolate banana cake. Aside from being the most expensive meal I have had in a very long time, it was also one of the most delicious. The brisket melted in my mouth and the risotto was perfect. I could have eaten a huge bowl of the soup and been happy. It was spicy and flavourful but not so hot that all you can taste is the heat. The banana cake was a very small portion, 3 very small bites, but it was so rich that it was just the right amount.

It was a difficult meal to "count" so I just allocated all of my weekly points (49) to it and will stick to my daily points for each day the rest of the week. This won't be a problem, I've done it many times and I also have activity points if I really need them.

I had planned yesterday to be a rest day from exercise but I ended up walking from the Eaton Centre at Yonge/Dundas to the Royal Alex which was about half an hour. Not a big deal except I was wearing very flimsy, non supportive galdiator sandals and today my feet are very, very sore. I had planned to redo Week 2 of C25K starting today but my feet were just too sore so I ended up walking to the Wentworth Stairs with my son's girlfriend and we did the stairs then walked back.

Still have a ton of housework and laundry to do. Just a normal weekend around here :) How's yours going?

Day 118, New Year

2011-04-28T20:43:00.001-04:00

I struggled today. This was the last run of Week 2, but I am definitely redoing the week before I go to Week 3. Week 3 has 3 minutes straight of running. Not ready yet, the 90 seconds is a still a challenge, it's not as hard as it was the first time, but its not easy yet.

Funnily enough, even though I felt like I struggled today, I improved my speed for running by almost 2 min per mile over yesterday. My walking pace stayed the same. After the warm up walk, I don't push myself in the walk and try to focus on putting more energy into the running intervals and use the walking intervals for recovery.

When I was running into the wind and it was hard and I wanted to stop, I kept picturing 400 lb people on treadmills on Biggest Loser and told myself that if they could do that, I could certainly run for 90 seconds at my own pace. And so I did.

It was very windy on our little mountain tonight and normally I pass lots of diehard runners, tonight it was just me out there.

I had a stellar eating day and feel firmly back in control of that now too. I went out for lunch and had a salad with grilled chicken and it was delicious.Restaurant meals are usually triggers for me, not to overeat, but to make unhealthy choices. I'm glad I did well today.

Tomorrow night I am eating dinner out - will make another good choice - and going to see Calendar Girls so it will be a rest day for exercise because I won't be home til really late but I will pick up C25K on Saturday.

Hope your day was wonderful!

Day 117, New Year

2011-04-27T21:02:00.000-04:00

Week 2, Day 2 of C25K. I know the counter says its Day 3, but it got screwed up yesterday when the program turned off, so I have one more day of Week 2.

While I'm on the subject of C25K, there is a huge jump from Week 2 to Week 3. It goes from running 90 seconds to 3 minutes!! Seriously?????

I also think the GPS on the C25K program cuts in and out because when I do the same route using my Nike+ it is more like 1.8 miles. It doesn't really matter as long as I can keep running longer and longer.

Ok..weigh in. Up 1.5 lbs which I was fully expecting. It's not "OK" though and I am determined to hit my 25lbs next week, that means losing 2.1lbs this week. It's not impossible. I've done it in other weeks and now I have added more activity so...it's doable. I did get my clapping hands charm for 16 weeks tonight though so thats my first charm to add to my shiny keyring.

I got a coupon for a free week of Curves and I'm going to give it a shot just for something different, when I checked them out a few years ago I thought they were very expensive considering what they offered, the hours they are open and that there are no shower facilities! But for free, I'm willing to give it a second look. Any of you go there regularly?

Day 116, New Year

2011-04-26T19:23:00.001-04:00

Another rainy, cold day in the GTA folks. Ugh!!!

Went out tonight and did the Week 1 rep of C25K. I got to the seventh running interval and my iPhone stopped and when I restarted it, the C25K program was back at the beginning so I had to guesstimate the last walk/run and cool down walk.

I am tired tonight folks. I don't seem to be sleeping well since I came home last Friday and I didn't sleep well last week when I was away...and 430 seems impossible this week after a week of not getting up at 430.

Biggest Loser tonight, I missed last week so I'm looking forward to catching up.

Be back tomorrow with weigh in results....you might not want to stop by - I am promising nothing spectacular. That's exactly what I'm promising.

Day 115, New Year

2011-04-25T20:11:00.001-04:00

Week 2, Day 1 of Couch to 5K. It was pouring rain, cold and very windy. Determination or stupidity?

That was rhetorical..no need to respond.

Funnily enough – I got a response from Quantum Scale today saying my scale will be send early next week. Coincidence or web crawlers you think?

Day 104 - 114, New Year

2011-04-24T19:32:00.000-04:00

Reset.
Reset.
Reset.

Ugh! I spent the last week away from home. Me and non-routine and weight loss = epic fail.

I ate out way too much over the last week and although I did my best to control portion sizes and kinds of foods...it was still way over what I would eat normally.

On the plus side I did go to the gym/pool every day, which is more than I would have done while I was at home. I did miss my weigh in for the week though so I'll be back to my regular weigh in on Wednesday and hoping I was able to contain the damage, if not.....it's a just a moment in time and next weigh in will be better.

Eating crappy food makes me feel crappy. Yeah, I knew this already...but this week was a slap in the face reminder.

I'm home now and hitting reset. This week will rock.

A few weeks ago I received an email from Susan at Quantum Scale to do a review and give away. I was told my scale would be received in a few days, I could review it then host my giveaway. To date, my scale hasn't arrived, despite several follow up emails and being told it was sent and that I would receive a tracking number. I'm really disappointed as I was looking forward to doing the giveaway and also having the scale.....I know some of other bloggers got their's without a hitch so that makes me even more disappointed. If anyone has a contact other than Susan - would you shoot me the contact info? Maybe I can follow up that way.

Happy Easter and Passover.

Day 103, New Year

2011-04-13T19:21:00.000-04:00

Today's post is brought to you by the letters: W T and F and the ever useful ?

Weight Watchers weigh in was a loss of 0.4 lbs.

Seriously, that's all I can say about that without delving into the use of many non-alphabetic characters on my keyboard.

Went out at lunch today for a walk:

Day 102, New Year

2011-04-12T19:44:00.001-04:00

Couch to 5K…continues. How come it measures in miles when it’s called Couch to 5K???? I cannot find the option to switch to km.

Day 101, New Year

2011-04-11T18:40:00.001-04:00

I worked for the provincial government for 10 years, ending in 1998 and am now working for a company that although not really government, is governed by the City of Toronto and parts of the Ontario government. I am so bad at office politics. I have zero, zip, nada, zilch patience for the games that go on in bureaucracy. It is making for stressful work life right now, I had forgotten how bad it was when I was with GO and had hoped that with my own maturity and life experience it wouldn’t bother me so much returning to that environment…but it does.

Thankfully with Spring now upon us I’m able to get out of the office at lunch and enjoy the sunshine and have some time to think about something other than work. Today was a beautiful, beautiful day.

Today I walked 2.72 km at lunch and am feeling pretty tired…so it will be an early night for me tonight.

I’m planning to do Week 1, Day 2 of C25K tomorrow night and then enjoying The Biggest Loser.

I’ll be back on Wednesday with my weigh in results. I’m hoping for a new charm to add to my key ring :)

Day 100, New Year

2011-04-10T15:31:00.001-04:00


Up	Down

Wentworth: The original wooden steps built in 1903 consisted of 6” to 7 ¼” risers. The stringers rested on cedar posts sunk 4-7’ in the ground. The original staircase had 570 steps. After a rock slide in March 1983 they were replaced with metal steps just east of the position of the original steps and now follow the path of the old East End Incline Railway. They have 498 steps.

That’s what I did today! It’s about a 6 min walk from my apartment building to the top of the stairs..then it’s straight down. Down was not too bad…as long as I didn’t look down or to either side of me and just focused on putting one foot in front of the other. But when people ran past me and the stairs shook, I did feel a little dizzy so I just went slower until they were well past me.

Coming up…well I did stop a few times but I had to go back up, it was the quickest way back home! At the top my legs were like jello, I thought for sure I had left them back on the stairs. I rested for 3 minutes then started walking home and once I started walking, the jelliness disappeared.

Someone numbered the steps with a sharpie and there are actually 500 steps..that’s 500 all the way down and 500 all the way back up. And I did it!!!

Between yesterday and today, I should sleep well tonight.

Day 97 - 99, New Year

2011-04-09T19:29:00.000-04:00

I did it.

Again.

Week 1, Day 1 of Couch to 5K. Inspired by my friends Melissa and Kat and encouraged by Tiffany, I thought it was worth another shot. Last year I made it to the end of Week 3 before my knees and hip hurt too much.

I ran outside, on asphalt for the most part, and in daylight!!!

And look what song I ended on...hahaha. That's me when it comes to running :)

Day 94 - 96, New Year

2011-04-06T20:22:00.001-04:00

A loss of 1.3 lbs tonight to bring me to 24 lbs. I needed 23 to get this shiny trinket.

Next goal 25 lbs...I know it doesn't sound challenging, but WW will give me a shiny 25 charm to add to my keyring...so it's my next goal.

WW and the Running Room are hosting a 5km walk on June 12th. I'm signing up (and not JUST for the shiny 5km charm I'll get for completing it).

Day 90 - 93, New Year

2011-04-03T15:02:00.000-04:00

I've had a productive weekend.

Got an oil change and found my car needs a relatively costly repair.
Cleaned the apartment.
Went for two walks.
Spent some time with a good friend.
Watched two movies.
Made this carrot soup - seriously the BEST carrot soup I've ever tasted, which is a good thing because this recipe makes a lot so I'll be eating it all week for lunch.

My head doesn't seem to be in the weight loss game the last few days, I'm going through the motions though and hope that counts for something and hope that sometime in the next day or so my thoughts will match my actions.

I'm hoping Spring sticks around and I can go outside for walks on my lunch. There's a handy 2 km loop around my office building that is perfect to fit in some exercise and to clear my head mid-day.

Other than that, I'm hanging in - one day at a time.

Day 84 - 89, New Year

2011-03-30T19:33:00.000-04:00

It has been one hell of a week. Lots of roller coasters.

I didn't have a stellar week eating since last Wednesday. I was away for a few days and that meant restaurant meals, although I made pretty good choices, there's no way to really control the sodium or the hidden fats in seemingly innocent foods. Actually, Applebee's in the US has a Weight Watchers menu and I ordered Paradise Salad, including dressing it was 9 points, since I never eat salad dressing, I know I over tracked that meal. IHOP has a Slim and Fit menu with items under 400 calories and I ordered from that for breakfast the next day...but there was a lot more carbs than I would normally eat over the last week. Once I start the carb slide, it's a quick ride down to an all carb free for all. This week was kinda like that, I did go over my total points by 5 for the week but I never count my activity points.....argh...somehow it all balanced out to a loss of 2.5 lbs this week.

That is 0.3 lbs away from 10%. Yeah, I know I'll get it next week...but damn....so close!!!

Total is 22.7 lbs, average is 1.75 lbs a week...still a great average, I think.

Plan for the week ahead is to count my activity points - just to see ;) and also to end the carb overload and get back to more balanced eating.

Day 76 - 83, New Year

2011-03-24T18:58:00.001-04:00

That's my twelve week graph from Weight Watchers. The 10% line at 225lbs is from when I lost my first 10% from my highest weight of 250. I didn't delete the old data. My new 10% line from my restart in December, 2010 is 212. 2.8 lbs to go as of today. This week I lost 1.1 lbs for a total of 20.2 lbs in 12 weeks.

This feels like it's been a long, long week. Yesterday was another monster snowstorm that made my commute horrendously long, but thankfully, I made it home safely, unlike many of the cars I saw spin out or flipped over. It was very scary.

Yesterday my right eye started hurting and watering. It was swollen and bloodshot within an hour and I could barely get my contact out. When I finally did, it did alleviate some of the pain but not all of it. This morning it was still swollen, bloodshot and very sore. Turns out I scratched the retina somehow. Thankfully, this is apparently very common and heals quickly on it's own in most cases. The only downside for me is having to wear glasses for 5- 7 days..UGH..it's only been one day and I already miss my contacts.

Hope you are all having an awesome week :)

Day 72 - 75, New Year

2011-03-16T18:49:00.001-04:00

It has been a really crappy day. One of the worst days I've had in a very long time. I am both emotionally and physically tired tonight.

The topper to my crappy day was my weigh in. I gained 0.8 lb. So now I am at 19.1 lbs lost and 3.9 to my 10%.

I am disappointed. I am not devastated. I don't know why I gained. I stayed within my points again this week. I did the same amount of physical activity. If I look over my tracker, I can't see that my meals were wildly different from previous weeks. It's just one of those things. Could I have had a better week, eating and exercising? Sure. It's always possible to do better.

This weight loss is going to be my last time. It is going to take as long as it takes. I am not backing down or giving up. I am pushing forward and downward. Are you with me?

Day 69 - 71, New Year

2011-03-12T13:05:00.000-05:00

My plans were foiled today by a sick car. Coincidentally my eldest son is in bed sick with a cold/cough and my youngest is at a friend's house...so I'm all alone. What's a girl to do?

Cook!

I've been wanting to try this Peanut Butter Chocolate Dessert Hummus recipe for over a month now and today seemed like the perfect day. I decided to go one step further and bake them into cookies. I've pasted the recipe at the end of the post for you.

The verdict:

Hummus - Delicious. I love it. I absolutely cannot taste the chickpeas. This would be good with low fat graham crackers or even arrowroot cookies (my personal favourite), but since I had neither in the house, I ate it with a spoon. For the Weight Watchers out there, 1/4 cup = 4 PP.

Cookies - I got 30 cookies out of the recipe and at 1 WW PP, that is excellent. These cookies are clean, nothing processed or fake - and are even better than other baked peanut butter cookies I've made. My boys didn't even know the difference and these are way better for growing boys than store bought or even home baked with processed sugar, flour and peanut butter.

I absolutely love this website, The Wannabe Chef. This is the first recipe I've tried but they all look delicious and easy.

Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip Dessert Hummus

Ingredients:

2 cups chickpeas
1/4 cup natural peanut butter
1/4 cup + 2 tablespoons maple syrup
1/2 Tablespoon vanilla extract
1/4 cup mini chocolate chips

Drain, measure, wash, and peel your chickpeas. Peeling them isn’t absolutely necessary but it makes for the creamiest hummus and really is worth the effort.(Note: I didn't peel mine and it came out quite smooth).

In a food processor, add the first 4 ingredients and process until the hummus is smooth and emulsified(the one thing no one wants for dessert is chunky chickpea pieces in their dessert).

Remove ~~and lick~~ the blade and fold in the chocolate chips. Move into a deep serving bowl and serve with graham crackers or baby carrots.

My cookie version:

Preheat oven to 350F.

Spoon onto parchment paper on a cookie sheet and bake for 15-18 minutes. The tops will be slightly brown, but they will still look very soft and mushy.
Let them cool about 10 min on the cookie sheet then cool completely on a wire rack. If you don't let them cool, they WILL fall apart when you pick them up. They are slightly gooey and chewy on the inside, if you like them firmer, you could probably cook them a bit longer at a lower temp. They would look prettier if you use a cookie scoop!

Enjoy!

Day 66 - 68, New Year

2011-03-09T19:57:00.000-05:00

Week 10 on the new Weight Watchers Points Plus plan. I really wanted to tell you I was down 20lbs in ten weeks, doesn't that just have a nice ring to it?

But it didn't work out that way.

I've lost 19.9 lbs in 10 weeks.

And...I am thrilled :)

This program seems to suit my medical issues much better than the old one. It really makes me think before eating processed carbohydrates. The points are so high for these types of foods that it discourages me from eating them and turns me towards better-for-me choices. I still indulge occasionally but I do it within my points and it's balanced by a healthy diet most of the time.

Last Friday was my son Liam's 14th birthday. When I asked him what he wanted that night, he said "Coldstone". Coldstone is an ice cream parlour that has the most decadent and delicious ice cream I've ever tasted. So...I had a bowl with him. It was 12 points of sweet cream ice cream with chocolate chips and it was worth every point. Every spoonful was delicously creamy and cold. I had no regrets about spending the points on it. Not a single second of remorse or guilt for eating so many unhealthy calories, otherwise what was the point of having it?

Day 62 - 65, New Year

2011-03-06T17:54:00.003-05:00

Just for fun, today.

Age: 43
Bed size: Queen
Chore you dislike: Vacuuming
Dogs: Not an animal person.
Essential start to your day: Hot, hot shower.
Favourite colour: Just about any shade of blue.
Gold or silver: Gold
Height: 5’ nuttin.
Instruments played:None, I failed recorder and ukelele in grade 4.
Job title: Procurement Support Assistant
Kids: 2 handsome, smart and funny boys
Live: with boys mentioned above.
Mom's name: Janet Louise
Nicknames: Enz, the Enz, Enzyme,
Overnight hospital stays: 3
Pet peeves:Changes frequently.
Quote from a movie:Star Trek: Spock, in this case, do yourself a favor: Put aside logic. Do what feels right.

Righty or lefty: Right
Siblings: Tony, Michele and Louisa
Time you wake up: M-F 430 a.m. - Weekends - anytime
Underwear: always matching!
Vegetables you don't like:Eggplant, artichoke
What makes you run late: Waiting for boys to get ready.
Yummy food you make: Anything Italian.
X-Rays you've had: tailbone, wrist, back, lungs, knees
Zoo animal favourites: Not an animal person but I like watching the lions.

Day 58 - 61, New Year

2011-03-02T18:45:00.000-05:00

End of week 9....and another 3.7 lbs down. Total is now 18.3 lbs. Average is just over 2 lbs a week.

You know what that means?

4.7 lbs to 10%.

Awesome....if I do say so myself :)

Day 57, New Year

2011-02-26T19:40:00.001-05:00

Wrinkly and worth it. An amazing post I saw on FaceBook and had to link to here, we all need to remember this when we have bad days/weeks/months.....

http://www.danoah.com/2011/02/wrinkly-and-worth-it.html

Day 53 - 54, New Year

2011-02-23T19:44:00.001-05:00

Week 8 is done with a loss of 0.6 lbs. Not a stellar loss for what I thought was a stellar week, but that happens sometimes. It will all catch itself up. Total loss is 14.6 lbs, average is 1.83 lbs a week, still pretty good.

Last night I made my favourite almond butter cookies and only ate 2. I was pretty proud of that.

This morning I ran up a flight of stairs at the train station and although I was a little out of breath at the top, I wasn't dying.

All in all, this weight loss thing is going well.

Day 52, New Year

2011-02-21T19:57:00.003-05:00

Happy Family Day to all my Ontario friends.

Three days done. The verdict: SUCCESS. I had no doubt if I focused and planned and made conscious decisions about food that I could eat stay on track and make better choices over the weekend than I have been the last few weeks, but doing it, is empowering and confidence building and proves that I can change habits if I want to.

I woke up this morning with a sinus headache that would not quit all day, so I was not as ambitious or interesting in my cooking today. Since I was slogging over laundry for over two hours and I still had over 40 Weekly Points left I decided to treat myself to Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups. I have two favourite chocolate combinations, chocolate and peanut butter and chocolate and mint, today the peanut butter won out.

Today’s meals were sorely lacking in fruit and vegetables but I’ll make up for it tomorrow, I normally have 3-5 servings of fruit a day plus 3-5 servings of vegetables.

My week goes Thursday to Wednesday and so far, I’ve used 10 of 49 of my Weekly Points and I’m looking for Tuesday and Wednesday to be easy-breezy days so I’m right on track right now. I didn’t have plans to eat out this week, the first week since I started the program, so that helps a lot in being able to control the Weekly Points since I usually save them for that.

Tomorrow is back to work and back to my normal eating schedule….and…Wednesday is weigh-in #8.

Monday		Points Plus
	1 cup skim milk 1 pkg NSA Carnation Instant Breakfast	3
	100 g container of Source Superfruit Selection Yogurt	1
	4 all white meat chicken nuggets and 13 steak fries (all baked)	7
	Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups	7
	2 chicken thighs with thai chili sauce 1 cup basmati rice and corn niblets with leftover roasted veg (that never made into soup!)	13
	banana 1 tbsp Dark Chocolate Dreams coffee with cream	7
	Total Points Plus for Day	38

Day 51, New Year

2011-02-20T20:38:00.001-05:00

Two days down and one to go for Operation: Stay on Track this Long Weekend. It was less of a “munchy” day today. That’s one of the things I love about Weight Watchers, you learn to eat the right amount of food but it doesn’t matter how or when you break up your meals. I used two of my weekly points today.

Today I was reminded of the first 5-6 years when Den and I were first married, before we had the boys. I used to work a full time job, a part time job, and take college courses part time on weekends/evenings. The only day I would ever have completely off was Sunday.

Sunday mornings we would sleep in, go somewhere nice for brunch, a long drive in the country and then stop at a market (most times a farmer’s market) and pick up our groceries for the week. Head home, a lovely afternoon nap and then prep/cook for the week ahead.

I had so little time at home then, if I didn’t make all our lunches and most of our meals – we would have been eating out all the time – something we couldn’t afford to do financially or logistically, I didn’t even drive back then! It was fun on Sundays to plan meals for the week and then make them, package them and label them. We both loved to cook and try new recipes and ingredients.

Weekday mornings started at 5 a.m. and we could just grab our lunches/snacks for the day and go. Dinner was sometimes a half hour squeezed in between work and school or sometimes after my part time job at 11 p.m., but there was always something ready to throw in the oven or microwave.

It was important to me then, that we didn’t waste money on eating out and that we ate healthy because we were both so busy and could not afford to get sick.

Then we had Iain and I quit the part time job, and took a break from school (I didn’t go back until Liam was in kindergarten) and somehow although I always made sure Iain had home made baby food and ate well, me and Den relied more and more on takeout. Going out for dinner became routine rather than the once in a while treat and somehow, cooking and prepping became a chore rather than something I loved to do.

Over the last few years, I’ve rediscovered my love of cooking and sometimes I’m really excited about trying something new again.

Sunday		Points Plus
	1 cup strawberries 1/2 cup non fat Greek yogurt 1/4 cup Go Lean Crunch 1 tbsp maple syrup coffee with cream	6
	1/4 cup spinach dip 10 multigrain rice crackers	4
	Shepherd’s Pie and mixed vegetables	15
	Baked apple topped with pecans and light whip cream	4
	Coffee with cream	2
	Total Points Plus for Day	31

Day 50, New Year

2011-02-19T17:57:00.001-05:00

My goal for this weekend is to eat the same way I do during the week – not necessarily the same foods, since I have more time on the weekends, but to eat healthy, delicious, good for me physically and emotionally food.

My problem is not that I just don’t care on the weekends, it’s that I don’t plan the way I do for Monday-Friday and I am tired and use that as an excuse to grab something quick. Quick usually means overprocessed and unhealthy.

If my boys are away at the weekend, I tend to graze rather than eat complete meals. That’s not a problem, as long as the grazing is on good stuff and controlled.

This three day weekend I’m turning that around.

Today was a success. I ended up having to put some pecans on my berries and yogurt to make up an extra 2 points to meet my 29 per day, I wouldn’t have bothered, but there was a day this week where I was 7 points short and I don’t want to make a habit of it.

Saturday		Points Plus
	1.5 cups skim milk 1 pkg NSA Carnation Instant Breakfast 1 banana 1/2 cup spinach 4 ice cubes	4
	1/4 cup Spinach Dip (recipe below) 1 toasted bagel thin 1 cup mixed melon	4
	coffee with cream 1 WW mint snack bar	4
	2 breaded fish fillets 1 cup baked sweet potato “fries” 1 tbsp non fat Greek yogurt mixed with 1/2 tbsp Thai chili sauce	12
	1 cup strawberries 1/2 cup Greek yogurt 1 tbsp maple syrup 2 tbsp chopped pecans	5
	Total Points Plus for Day	29

Spinach Dip

This is a recipe I modified from a Weight Watchers recipe.

3/4 cup non-fat Greek yogurt
1 pound baby spinach, uncooked
1/4 cup Parmigiano Reggiano cheese, grated
1/8 cup onion
1 clove fresh garlic
1/8 tsp ground nutmeg
1 tsp cayenne pepper
fresh ground salt and pepper to taste

Steam or microwave the spinach until wilted. Let cool completely and squeeze out excess moisture.
In a food processor, combine spinach and all other ingredients.
Process until smooth.
Let chill for at least 15 minutes.

Makes 8 servings. 1 serving = 1/4 cup of dip = 1 WW Points Plus

Day 49, New Year

2011-02-18T19:51:00.001-05:00

Spinach Vermicelli and
Roasted Vegetables

This has the to be the most delicious meal I've made in a long time and so easy!!

I have a hard time cooking "for one", but tonight I was determined to take the time and make myself a healthy and delicious meal, but it had to be easy!

I picked up some spinach vermicelli at Whole Foods a few weeks ago but never got around to cooking it. A one cup (uncooked) portion is a hefty 8 points! But today I had the points and I decided I would try it.

I put some halved grape tomatoes, a quarter of a white onion, a chopped zucchini and a full head of garlic (whole) in a roasting pan, drizzled some olive oil on it, some salt and pepper and tossed to coat. I roasted it for about 40 min in a 400 C oven and it was done. The vermicelli cooked in boiling water in about 45 seconds. You can't really see it in this photo but after it's cooked, the vermicelli is a very light transparent green.

Absolutely loved this. It was worth the 11 points (vermicelli + olive oil). There is about half the vegetables left in the pan and I'll use that pureed tomorrow with some fat free chicken stock to make a soup.

Long weekend here in Ontario for most of us....and I'm just relaxing and hanging out at home. Hope your weekend is awesome!

Day 42 - 48, New Year

2011-02-17T10:14:00.000-05:00

Week 7 and I was down another 1.2 lbs...total loss so far is 14 lbs. I am 9 lbs away from 10%. That's exciting :)

I've been doing ok. Weekends have become a challenge for me - I'm staying within my points (DP and WP) but eating crappy food on the weekends and it needs to stop. I'm all about having a treat if I really want it, or enjoying a decadent food just because it tastes good, but this is just mindless eating because I can't be bothered to cook. The food is crappy in nutrition and satisfaction - it's just blah! This weekend I'm going to break the cycle.

Valentine's Day came and went, and it was my first Valentine's Day as a single person since I was 13! The day didn't suck as much as I thought it would, to be honest. I've gone through all the firsts now - first anniversary, first birthday, first Christmas, first Valentine's......it can only get easier right? That's my hope anyway :) I think the next "hard" thing will be the boys' birthdays and Liam's is in a few weeks.

It's a long weekend here in Ontario (for most of us) and I am looking forward to three days away from work.

Day 37 - 41, New Year

2011-02-10T12:31:00.000-05:00

Week 6 of the new Weight Watchers Points Plus Program brought me a 1.2 lb loss. I was thrilled to get this loss because my last weigh in was just on Saturday and it was quite a good number. I am now officially at 5% of my original weight lost (from my WW starting weight) and I got my shiny, silver 5% sticker. Little things make me happy!

I am still tracking diligently and staying within my points. Speaking of which, I have now graduated to 29 points per day which is the lowest number allowed on this plan, I still have 49 weekly points as well.

I have to thank some of my GTA blogging crew for their constant support and motivation - Kerry, Tiffany, Erin - you ladies rock and it is so inspiring to be doing this along with you all. I'm so looking forward to seeing you and the other amazing ladies on Saturday.

What else is going on in my life?

Truthfully - not alot right now. I've had a couple of busy weekends but life is pretty much back to normal this weekend and I am glad of the opportunity to relax and catch up with my boys, it feels like I hardly ever see them during the week because my days are so long and then every other weekend they spend with their Dad. Sometimes I look at them and think...Wow..they are men..when did that happen? My "baby" will be 14 in a few weeks.

I hope you are all keeping well. Reading your blogs keeps me motivated, so I'm off to do that right now.

Day 34 - 36, New Year

2011-02-05T15:59:00.001-05:00

It's been a whirlwind of a week. Drama was the word of the week, at home, at work, weather, personal stuff....I am so glad it's Saturday.

I am leaving in a few minutes to go into downtown Toronto to see Billy Elliot with my dear friend Bill. I'm so excited to be seeing this musical and be spending time with Bill.

Because of the winter storm we had on Thursday I didn't go to my regular Weight Watchers weigh-in. I went this morning and saw a loss of 3.9 lbs which puts me at 5% lost from my Weight Watchers starting weight 5 weeks ago. That seems like a big number but it was 10 days instead of 7 and it was a morning rather than an evening weigh in, so I know it will balance itself out when I weigh in again this coming Wednesday...but it's still nice to see isn't it? My weekly average over the 5 weeks is 2.3 lbs - not too shabby!!!

The line up at the meeting was long - lots of new members still joining, but they had a special express lane for monthly pass holders so I didn't have to wait at all...that was nice :) I wasn't able to stay for the meeting because I had to take my car in to be fixed but the flyer said the topic of the week was "Getting Back on Track" and I wish I could have stayed.

The last three days have been so hard for me. I've been struggling with mindless eating because I let myself get too hungry and just started grazing while waiting for my meal to cook, I was picking at leftovers, I was eating crappy food just because I didn't feel like cooking for one....a million reasons - all of them situations I have strategies for and have used successfully in the past. Today I seem to be back on track and hoping that I am out of the worst and am refocused again. Will keep you posted.

Shout out to my blogger girls cause we're all doing lunch next weekend...woohooo!!! Miss you guys!

Day 31 - 33, New Year

2011-02-02T11:30:00.004-05:00

Do I see cheekbones?
On me I mean..not him.

Day 20-30, New Year

2011-01-30T19:47:00.000-05:00

Ok..third times the charm. Blogger just ate my post twice.

I am still hanging in, still tracking and following the new Weight Watchers Points Plus program. Unfortunately, I am also still fighting a cold/cough and have been sleeping a lot. The weekends are too short as it is, without sleeping them away.

Last night I went to the home of a former co-worker for dinner and he and his partner made amazing, traditional Brazilian food. The food and the company and just getting out of my routine were wonderful and I think did me a world of good.

Normally I have no plans for the weekends, but the next few weekends I have plans every Saturday, which is kind of nice. Next weekend I am going to the theatre. I am really looking forward to it.

Kerry, Tiffany, Erin and I have met our one month challenge of tracking! Go us! Nothing is stopping us now.

Last week I ~~only~~ lost 1/2 a pound. At first I was disappointed, but then I looked at my total over 4 weeks and I am not doing half bad. Of course, I'd love to lose 2 lbs consistently every week, but past experience tells me I won't so why do I keep thinking it?

Be back soon, I promise :) I hope you are all keeping well - I'm off to catch up with your blogs.

Day 17 -19, New Year

2011-01-19T19:56:00.003-05:00

It’s Wednesday and Wednesday means Weigh-In Day.

I’ve been fighting a cold the last two weeks, I seem to get better for a day or two then it comes back. This time though the cough was worse and I ended up taking cold/flu meds around the clock – still am – to alleviate the symptoms. I fully expected to see a gain or a very slight loss. I have been tracking diligently and staying within my points and eating 2-3 pieces of fruit a day as well as 2-3 vegetables but in the past, when I am sick, I always gain. Normally though when I have a cold my blood sugar is higher than normal, this time around it was normal (for me) and steady.

Anyway, long story short – scale showed a loss of 1.2 lbs. That’s a total of 7.2 lbs in 3 weeks. Isn’t it tempting to extrapolate that forward and say, “That means in 10 months I’ll be at goal.” Yeah...life doesn’t work that way.

I’m good with this. Soon I’ll hit my 5% (11 lbs) loss with WW and then the next goal is 10% (23 lbs) and I am not looking beyond that right now.

The meeting topic was not depriving yourself of foods you really love, but to fit them into your lifestyle by managing portions. I’m really liking this meeting and the leader. Tonight the meeting was packed, there were over 70 people in that room! The group has a good dynamic and everyone seems very positive. The leader has a good sense of humour and can laugh at herself and she is very good at making sure everyone is included - it’s not the least bit cliquey, even though it is obvious who the lifers are.

I promised I’d tell you all about my new-to-me foods but because I’ve not been feeling well I’ve been eating pretty bland and easy, soup, crackers, sandwiches, fruit, protein shakes; so I’ve not been adventurous...but I haven’t forgotten about them. My boys are with Dennis this weekend so I will have some time to myself to cook and experiment and perhaps make up some dinners and lunches in advance for next week.

The days are getting longer, it’s actually still light when I get to my car in the evening – another week or so and it will be light when I get home. I am so looking forward to that. I go out in the dark and come home in the dark and I sit in an area with no windows so it sometimes feels like I never see daylight even though when I go for my short walks at lunch around the concourse, I can see the sky through the roof and windows, it still feels like the sun is hiding from me all day.

We’re almost at day 21 of our Tracking Challenge – big shout out to Kerry, Erin and Tiffany - and 21 days make a habit so there is no reason to stop now, is there?

Day 16, New Year

2011-01-16T15:57:00.000-05:00

I am trying to convince myself I don't have a cold. I am ignoring the symptoms in the hopes that they will go away sooner. I'll let you know how that works for me.

I forgot to mention yesterday that I went to Whole Foods. I love Whole Foods. The one near me, in Oakville, has a very small seating area otherwise I would actually go there and hang out and have lunch. Their coffee is excellent as well.

It is pricey but I like that I can get items there that I can't find anywhere else and I get lots of ideas from their salad bar and deli/prepared meals counter. Yesterday we saw an orzo, cranberry and pecan salad. It looked delicious. They always have samples and yesterday I tried Amy's Refried Beans. They were delicious! I've never liked refried beans but these were creamy and didn't have that heavy, beany taste - you know? I like most of Amy's products but am afraid to try them in case I don't like them and wasting money. I should be more adventurous.

Over the next week, I'll write about some of the new-to-me food items I picked up and will be trying.

I haven't been outside yet but it looks like a sunny, albeit cold, day in the neighbourhood. I wouldn't go out today if I didn't have to, but I need to drive my son's girlfriend home and pick up some fruit for the coming week and get tissues and some cold meds. I know they don't hasten the cold but they alleviate the symptoms and if I feel better, that's all that really matters.

Have a great Sunday!

Days 13-15, New Year

2011-01-15T22:05:00.000-05:00

Hello all!

Hope you are having a fantabulous weekend.

I had lunch with some great friends and then met another good friend for coffee. Then found out yet another good friend was in the hospital, with suspected pneumonia. Luckily she is in the hospital right next to where I live so I was able to go and see her in Emerg tonight.

I am still doing well with the new WW Points+ Program and tracking. My blood sugar is amazing and I am feeling pretty good.

I had the flu/cold earlier this week and seemed to be over it, but tonight my throat and ears are hurting again, so I hope it is not coming back. I just started a new job and don't have any sick time yet.

My life seems to be coming into balance the last month or so after months and months of what seemed like constant upheaval and change.

Onward and downward (on the scale!).

Day 7-12, New Year

2011-01-12T19:51:00.000-05:00

Hello everyone,

Bet y'all thought I disappeared again, huh?

No...just having trouble finding inspiration about what to write.

I'm still tracking, still eating healthy, still following the new Weight Watchers Point Plus Program. Today was my second weigh in and I was down another 2.4 lbs, which is a total of 6 in two weeks. I'm happy with that. It's the most I've lost in two weeks in oh....about a year and a half.

What else is new in my life? Not a thing my friends. Working, taking care of kids, cooking, cleaning - all the fun stuff, you know? Reading a lot lately, I love curling up with a pot of tea and a good book on a cold, wintry night.

I'm off to catch up with all your blogs.

Day 6 – New Year

2011-01-06T19:20:00.001-05:00

I am so, so, so glad that tomorrow is Friday.

Today is Day 6 of our Tracking Challenge and we are still going strong. 21 days to make a habit and we will make that and beyond.

Shout out to Erin, Kerry, Kate and Tiffany.

When I went to weigh in last night I stayed for the meeting and I really liked the leader. She was engaging and funny and very easy to relate to. The room was packed with all the resolution-joiners and lots of regular members. She went out of her way to welcome the newbies and explained the in-jokes when people seemed to laugh for no reason. My original plan was to go and weigh in and attend a meeting on Saturday mornings but I really like this leader so I might try and keep Wednesdays – if I can’t do Wednesdays (I know some nights I am just going to be too tired to stop after work), then Saturday will be my back up.

I really like tracking with my iPhone. I can look up points values and track without anyone seeing Weight Watchers stuff, you know? I’m not embarrassed and if anyone asks me I am more than happy to talk about the program and my experience, but I don’t need to advertise it either.

So, week 2 started today and my goal for today is to try and eat more protein at every meal.

That’s all I got tonight, I am tired from a long drive home on slippery, snowy roads and just want to curl up with a cup of hot chocolate and my book and then hit my bed early.

Take care, y’all :)