Fighting Every Step

Today was a good day. Eating was perfect. I felt amazing all day; full of energy, happy, non-stressed, pretty - feeling really good in my skin, you know?

I stopped on the way home at our local Metro (grocery store) and found they had a whole bunch of "Buy One - Get One Free" specials. Bonus!! With two teenage boys in the house, it seems the fridge is always empty, so this was a great chance to stock up on alot of staples.  That put me in a better mood.

I came home and Den had cleaned the kitchen, it looked amazing - tidy AND clean!  My pet peeve is coming home to a messy kitchen - it just puts me right off from cooking or spending any time there at all - especially when I left in the morning and it was clean!

Made and ate dinner and still felt great.  

Came upstairs and changed into shorts and sports bra and got ready for my "date" with Paul Plakas.  Started walking on the treadmill and I just couldn't get comfortable, couldn't find my stride, couldn't find the right pace, couldn't get my breathing right. I was pissed!!!  I wanted to stop and just say "F* It".  Then I got madder.

I could actually hear Paul Plakas saying to me, "You can't walk 30 minutes! You might as well go coffin-shopping right now and call it a day."  I just kept putting one foot in front of the other over and over, I was not going to stop. It took until I hit 20 minutes before I felt "ok".  Then I went to 35 minutes just because. So I ended up with 1.48 miles in 35 minutes, not the best I've ever done but I fought for those 35 minutes with every step.  My hair was plastered to my head and I had to peel my bra and shorts off they were so soaked with sweat.

The wierd thing is, I've walked farther and faster - many, many times. I don't know what was wrong tonight - I just couldn't get into it - but I'm glad I didn't give up.

Giving up is not an option anymore.