Mar 31, 2010

Marching Out

March is over. Time seems to be flying. I always find January to June goes by so quickly and then the rest of the year goes slower.

Another beautiful day by the lake of my favourite city (Toronto) and I saw lots of swans on the lake today. The boardwalk was much more crowded and as the weather gets nicer it will become more and more crowded - it may be time to start looking for another route next week.

One more day until the long weekend and I have gone from having no plans to suddenly fully booked - but in a good way. Family and friends and nice weather - what more could I ask for?


Points Eaten26/26 + 10 FP
Activity Points Earned3
Moving (goal 420 min) 
Week Total

123 (297 to goal)

Mar 30, 2010

With A Little Help from Bob Marley

Half way through a short week - gotta love that!! I am looking forward to the long weekend and hoping to get in some walking and some good cooking - I feel like I've not been doing any inspired cooking the last week or so - just same old same old. So, time to step it up!  I'd like to fit in a visit to Whole Foods on Saturday as well.

I have a bunch of playlists on my iPod for when I walk and one of my favourite ones starts with Redemption Song by Bob Marley - I like it because its a slower song to warm up to while I find my pace.  There's a line that always jumps out at me and inspires me.

Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery; 
None but ourselves can free our minds.

Isn't that what this is all about? The restraints we put on ourselves are all in our head. We put limitations on our strength, on our ambition, on our willpower and on everything we do. When we start to free ourselves from that mental slavery - great things happen. And when one great thing happens, it has a snowball effect - more great things happen, we feel stronger, more motivated and more successful and that leads to more great things happening. Truly, it does.

The other line that has profound meaning for me is:

But my hand was made strong
By the 'and of the Almighty.

It is both comforting and empowering for me to know that I am not alone and that I have all the strength I need - I need to use it.


Points Eaten26/26 +8 FP
Activity Points Earned3
Moving (goal 420 min) 
Week Total

81 (339 to goal)

Marvellous Monday


Points Eaten26/26
Activity Points Earned2.5
Moving (goal 420 min) 
Week Total

36 (384 to goal)

Mar 29, 2010

Chapter 11 - The Beck Diet Solution

When to Stop Losing and Start Maintaining

She starts by saying she asks her patients two questions:

1. What would you like to weigh?
2. What weight could make you at least minimally satisfied? (what is your satisfaction goal?)

She suggests that the answer to number one is our "ideal" and that the answer to number 2 is our realistic goal and that knowing the difference between these two numbers is a secret to success in maintaining (the next chapter).

She goes on to talk about the lowest achievable weight and the lowest maintainable weight - again usually two different numbers.

She says that at some point, we will stop losing and our bodies will settle at the right weight, at this point, it will not be feasible or realistic to lower calories or exercise more - our bodies will be "done".  She says our maintainable weight may not be our lowest possible, but it is where we will be able to stay comfortably without having to do anything extreme or struggle.

If you reach a weight that you feel is not your goal weight but you can't go any lower and it's not feasible, realistic or healthy to exercise more or lower your calories, then you may have to readjust your goals.  She suggests taking the focus off weight loss at this point and enriching your life in other ways. All those things you were going to do when you got to goal - do them now.

Although I understand the point of this chapter, I don't think she does a very good job of explaining how to know when you are at your goal weight (ideal or realistic) and although I think she is trying to discourage eating disorders and image dysmorphia - she doesn't really delve into that and once again, I found that she took a very serious issue and made it too simplistic.

Personally, I haven't decided on a goal weight yet. I'd like to hit 140. At 17 I was 119 and very, very, very skinny - too skinny for my curves - at 21 I was 135 and although at the time I felt I was "fat", looking back, I was curvy and perhaps could have lost about 10lbs but I was not fat by any standard.  Older than 40 now and two children later, I'd be happy at 140-145...but I won't truly know what I look like or feel like until I get closer.

Have you settled on your goal weight yet and if you are did you decide when to stop losing weight?

Mar 28, 2010

Hanging Out With The Stars

 I'm with the stars this week, I missed the moon by many, many miles (and about 300 minutes)!
The good thing about goals is that it's easy to set new ones and start again, so that's what I'm doing. 

Redoing last week's goal to move for 7 hours. This week,  I will succeed.  Last week was a crazy, extremely unusual week at work and I had no back up plan. This week should be normal, but if it isn't, I am better prepared to not let it sideline me. 

I learned something - I am not prepared for the unexpected - so this week I will be.

I did get out for a 45 minute walk with my friend Tina today but turned my ankle. It was very sore earlier and swollen, but seems normal now and only twinges a little now and again - hopefully it will be 100% by tomorrow.For some reason my Nike sensor didn't track the walk - which is disappointing! I am hoping that was just some kind of glitch and all will be normal with that tomorrow as well!


Points EatenNo appetite and snacked off and on, didn't write anything down.
Activity Points Earned2
Moving (goal 420 min) 
Week Total

124 min (296 to goal)

Mar 27, 2010

Nothing to see here folks, keep it moving!

Just trudging along day by day folks, nothing really outstanding to talk about in my little world.

It was a crazy busy work at week due to a crisis and the whole week was fighting fires - normally my work place is pretty steady, even keel but this week everything was upside down and it severely cut into my time for exercise since I normally get a 40 min walk in at lunch. This past week I didn't even eat lunch most days or leave my desk, let alone leave the trailer. Couple that with longer work days and by the time I got home I was exhausted.

Weekend is here and I am playing catch up for all the stuff I didn't do all week because of the above - I'm actually looking forward to Monday so I can go back to a normal routine - how crazy is that?

Going for a walk with my friend Tina and her dog Sadie tomorrow...

Told ya, nothing new here - move right along! 

Points Eaten 26/26
Activity Points Earned 0
Moving (goal 420 min)
Week Total

79 min (341 to goal)

Points Eaten 26/26 + 5 FP
Activity Points Earned 0
Moving (goal 420 min)
Week Total

79 min (341 to goal)

Mar 25, 2010

Nuttin’ Honey

I got nuthin’ tonight, folks. Fighting sleep so I’m going to let it win and turn in early. Talk to you all tomorrow!


Points Eaten 26/26
Activity Points Earned 3
Moving (goal 420 min)
Week Total

40 min (341 to goal)

Mar 23, 2010

Out With The Old....



...and in with the new!!!  I am in love. These are the most comfortable shoes I have ever had. I love the lime green on them.


My feet were really sore yesterday so I decided not to walk at all and give my feet a day’s rest so when I put on my brand new shoes, they would not be hurting at all.  It worked – well half my plan did. My feet and legs are no longer sore but I wasn’t able to get out today to walk at all and right now I am so tired I can barely keep my eyes open so I’m going to bed early.

I need to get a move on to meet the 7 hour goal, I’m now 2 hours and 21 min behind!


Points Eaten 26/26 + 10 FP
Activity Points Earned 0
Moving (goal 420 min)
Week Total

39 min (381 to goal)

Mar 22, 2010

Just One Thing

Like I said yesterday, when this weight loss thing is going well - there doesn't seem to be anything to think about - it just all "works". If I could find the magic combination of attitude, determination and planetary alignment and bottle it, I would be rich.

I can't explain what makes it work and what happens to make it all go wrong. I know there are a lot of bloggers right now, in the place I was last week; feeling defeated, weak, tired, fed up, hopeless - and I know it seems bleak sometimes.

When I get like that - I tell myself, I just have to do one thing GOOD FOR ME. Just one. That one thing will prove to me that I love me and that I am worth the effort.  Usually that one thing, turns my whole mood around. Sometimes convincing myself to JUST DO ONE THING is a fight in itself, but once I do it - life starts to look better almost immediately. It doesn't have to be a big thing - take the time to pack my meals for the next day; cook myself a healthy meal; go for a short walk; pack my workout stuff so it's ready in the morning; JUST ONE THING.

You can do one thing.

You would do a lot of things for a lot of people in your life.

Do just one thing for you.

Why are you still here? Go do it!


Points Eaten 26/26 + 10 FP
Activity Points Earned 0
Moving (goal 420 min)
Week Total

39 (381 to goal)

Who Has Seen The Wind?

Not only have I seen the wind, I fought it and won!

Mother Nature and Brother Wind did their best today to blow me over. They pummeled with gusts and pushed me sideways, driving the rain and cold into my eyes and face but I didn't let them stop me - I just kept pushing back.

From Spring to Winter in less than 3 days in Toronto. March is determined to go out like a lion. Tonight we are supposed to have freezing rain!

Another good day today, it's amazing how when I feel well I want to do the right things, and it is easy and effortless and when I don't feel well, I just seem to not care and everything is so hard.

Every day feels like a fight sometimes - but not today. Today was an easy day and I'm grateful for that. Everything seemed to fall into place (except the weather) and it was easy to eat right and get out and exercise today.

Points Eaten 26/26 + 9 FP
Activity Points Earned 3
Moving (goal 420 min)
Week Total

39 min - 3.06 km
39 min (381 to goal)

Mar 21, 2010

A Sunday Point of View

From my blog this past week, you can see I had a pretty crappy week. I was thinking about this yesterday and, mainly, reflecting on what I can do to make this coming week better.

Then I remembered.

This time last year, actually this week last year, my husband Dennis was in the Neuro ICU at a Toronto hospital recovering from brain surgery to clip two brain aneurysms. He was in a drug-induced coma and we were facing the prospect of losing him.

This week, he is about 95% recovered and we are blessed.

Compared to that - this week was a breeze. That week, that event;  that was the worst experience I have ever had in my 42 years.  This past week was a pothole in the road of life, and not a very big one at that.

Since I spent most of last week feeling like I had no control over many things - I decided to control what I could. I could control what I put into my mouth and I could control how much I exercise, I had set a goal of 20km for this week and to walk 7/7 days.

With some help from two great women in my life, Shelley and Tina, and her lovely dog, Sadie and Den - I hit the 20km mark today - right on time.

And with the help of Tiffany and all my other blogger friends, I was encouraged to keep going when I thought I didn't want to anymore.  You guys all rock!!

I didn't do 7/7 days but I am happy  ecstatic with the 6/7 and the 20.79km.

Next week's exercise goal is to move for 7 hours. I'm not setting a distance because I may not walk the entire time,  I may choose to do something else - but I will move for 7 hours next week. I'll let you know how I do!  This is going to be a busy week for me at work, we are processing month end billing - but I am going to get out at lunch time and walk and I am going to pack my lunch/snacks the night before. If I don't do it the night before, it doesn't get done at all. 

These things I can (and will) control.  

What is in your control this week to help you to reach your goals?

Points Eaten 25/26
Activity Points Earned 5.5
Moving 1 hr 16 min - 5.59 km

P.S. Crys - I used LiveWriter to design yesterday's post. The photos and text are actually in the cells of a table, then I turned off the table borders. I tried emailing you but the address didn't seem to work and for some reason, I couldn't leave a comment on your blog, it kept refreshing the page when I hit post.

Mar 20, 2010

Picture Perfect Day



Berry Protein Breakfast

Berry Protein Breakfast


Pretty ugly to
pretty pink


  Bye bye greys!



Hello Golden Chocolate !


DSCN0041Biggest Loser Lunch


Never too cold for Coldstone at the lake.





DSCN0054 Shelley and Me - BFF



Points Eaten 26/26 + 6 FP
Activity Points Earned 3.5
Moving 45 min – 3.39 km

Mar 19, 2010

Just the facts

Once again, I'm overwhelmed by your support.  Today was definitely an easier day. I was tired this morning but started the day off well with a fruit/protein smoothie and I realised that the last few days I had not eaten as much whole food as I normally do and I'm sure that the processed food and chemiclas contributed to my crappy mood and overall blech-ness.

I went out for a walk at lunchtime but forgot to have a snack before I left. About 20 minutes in, I literally felt my blood sugar fall to my feet. I felt really ill. I actually had to stop and sit for a few minutes before I could continue. The other mistake I made was not taking any money so I couldn't buy anything. I just walked back slowly and although I didn't make good time, I did manage 2.63 km and ate as soon as I got back. I am not insulin dependent, I take medication, so lows hardly ever happen and I don't normally worry about it. I usually have an apple or banana before heading out, I'm not sure why I forgot today.

I really tried to focus on my walking form today, heel strike, roll through the ball of the foot, keeping my spine elongated and my core engaged, keeping my shoulders over my hips - I have a tendency to hunch forward when I walk fast so it has been an effort to try and break that habit.  I definitely felt the heel pain more today so new shoes are on this weekend's agenda. I tried the Asics with gel and fell in love on the spot. This shoe was so comfortable and I liked that it is a trail shoe so it will be good for hiking.   I did try a few others, but none compared to them. The Easy Spirit shoes with the microbeads were also really comfortable but just looked funny and felt a bit awkward after a few minutes of walking around.

Dinner was more healthy, whole foods - fresh vegetables stirfried over brown rice - it was perfect.

We had a local pizza restaurant, Panago Pizza,  come into our trailer today to drop off free samples of pizza.  They left three decadently delicious pizzas - I had one teeny, tiny slice of the Philly Steak pizza and it was honestly, the best restaurant pizza I've ever had. I moved it out of my line of sight and called everyone on site to come and get it. 

You gotta do what you gotta do!

Points Eaten 26/26
Activity Points Earned 2
Moving 35 min - 2.63 km

Mar 18, 2010

Still Struggling

Today I told myself:
I am not going to quit TODAY
I just have to get through TODAY.  
Eat right and exercise TODAY.

This was my mantra. I literally had to say it out loud through my walk, write it down and read it over and over, I typed it out over and over into my computer and iPod. It was the only thing that kept me from deleting this blog, from throwing out my tracker, from just eating without thinking.   Now today is just about over, I am not sure about tomorrow and that scares me.

Tiffany kept me sane today. She reminded me that this isn't easy and that my feelings were justified, but I could not quit.

Points Eaten 26/26
Activity Points Earned 0
Moving 0

Points Eaten 26/26 + 5 FP
Activity Points Earned 4
Moving 4.28 km - 55 min

Mar 16, 2010

Spring In My Step

Look at that. 14C again today! 

Spring is here. It was a gorgeous day in downtown Toronto and I was itching to get out in the sunshine. I went into work early, partly to make up for yesterday and because I had to leave at 3:15 for a medical appointment...but I was not going to miss my lunchtime walk, no matter what. 

The last few outings, I have been walking along the boardwalk - it's not terribly busy yet - and there is less pedestrian/vehicular traffic than the sidewalks. It was a great walk, really cleared my head, boosted my energy and the sunshine put a spring in my step.  I got in 2.93 km in 36 minutes. Some people were in tanks and shorts!

I think the sore leg problem is related to my shoes, they are about a year and a half old and mostly were used on the treadmill til the last few weeks, so they "look" pretty new, but I think they have lost most of their shock absorbing protection - I noticed definite pain today in my heels while walking - that I've only had once before - when I needed new shoes. So I'm on the hunt for new shoes. Any recommendations? I am still walking - mostly - I do 2-3 minute running intervals now and again.

I made the almond butter cookies from last month's Clean Eating Magazine tonight...for my son. Yes, really, for him. The three I ate were for quality control purposes - honest!

 (Note to self: Those cookies are evil. Do not make them unless they are leaving the house immediately!)

Points Eaten 26/26 + 16 FP
Activity Points Earned 3
Moving 2.93 km - 36 min.

Mar 15, 2010

The best laid schemes....

“The best laid schemes o' mice and men Gang aft a-gley; And leave us naught but grief and pain For promised joy”

Robert Burns (1759-1796)

Monday always signals a new beginning to me, a chance to start fresh and make up for mistakes.

Today was a Monday gone wrong from the moment I woke up - I won't bore you with the mundane details of my daily life gone awry - but I can honestly say I am glad this Monday is coming to a close.

My weekend plans were equally awry and I felt like I accomplished naught that I set out to. I hate the feeling of wasting time or being unproductive; I need to learn to accept that not everything I plan will work out the way I planned - another life's lesson that I am working on.

I came home from work tonight, threw some chicken in the oven and then headed out for a walk. My legs were just not feeling it - I couldn't find my stride, my jacket was flapping, my pants were driving me nuts - nothing was right!  I just kept putting one foot in front of the other and did the shorter route around my neighbourhood; not in the best time but I forced myself to finish. My legs have been feeling like lead for a few days now and no amount of stretching or long soaks in the tub seem to be helping. They truly feel heavy, I've never experienced it before.

Tomorrow I will walk at lunch time again. Today I was 3 hours late for work and wasn't quite cheeky enough to get up and leave for an hour when I'd only been there for an hour ;)

This past week, I walked 14.89 km in 4 days. My goal was to walk every day so I fell short there, but I did walk 2x for two days so I am feeling good about that.

This week I am aiming for 7/7 days again but I'd like to hit 20 km. That's only just a little more than 5km than last week and is about an hour's worth of walking, if I hit the 7/7 days that is easily doable - so I'll check back next Monday and let you know how I did.  In the meantime, my mini should update daily. Thanks to Tamara for helping me out so I could get it on my blog.

Points Eaten 26/26
Activity Points Earned 2
Moving 25 minutes- 1.95 km

Weekend Recap

Monday. Monday - here we go again.


Points Eaten 26/26
Activity Points Earned 0
Moving 0


Points Eaten 26/26 + 5 FP
Activity Points Earned 0
Moving 0

Mar 12, 2010

Friday on My Mind

My new WW week starts tomorrow, so Friday should be my weigh in day. I didn't weigh in today because I only started Monday and I want to give my body time to get used to the extra exercise before I freak myself out with scale judgements.  Next Friday will be the weigh in I'm counting  - so you'll see the sidebar for the X-Weighted Challenge will say N/A for this week.  I am even considering only weighing in every two weeks to take the focus off the number and put the focus back on the get healthy and fit part of this plan.  I can argue with myself both ways quite convincingly.

I was so glad to wake up and go to work this morning - so glad it was Friday, that is!

I went out at lunch time and the wind and rain were coming right off the lake. There were some times when I was walking into the wind that I actually had to take a step sideways to keep my balance, it was that strong!  Definitely much more of a work out than a fairweather day, that's for sure.  My legs truly felt like lead and I couldn't push any faster so I decided to push farther, I kept telling myself, "You can turn around any time, just not yet". In total I walked for 39 minutes and 1.94 miles which is the furthest I've done in one time at lunchtime to date.

Next week is March Break and I have not planned to take any time off as yet, but I may end up taking a day to do stuff with the boys - maybe just a movie and dinner out - they don't seem to be interested in the zoo or Science Centre anymore ;(

Weekend plans
Saturday:     lots and lots of laundry and housework and food prep for the coming week
Sunday:       a hike/walk with my friend Tina and her dog Sadie

Points Eaten 25/26
Activity Points Earned 3
Moving 39 min - 3.12km

Falling Asleep

Yesterday was a pissy day at work. Pardon my language. You know those days when, if you could, you would say, "Take this job and shove it" was one of those days.

All I kept telling myself was - "You'll be going home, you'll be going home, you'll be going home". And I kept hearing this voice in the back of my head, "But you have to come back tomorrow...tomorrow...tomorrow" and I wanted to scream, or run out the door like a mad woman. Just so you know, I did neither. Working for the Ontario Government for 10 years taught me patience, if nothing else!

I had a heavy lunch - not on purpose - it just turned out to be cooked that way and left me feeling heavy and blech.

On my way home I stopped for groceries and was really feeling tired, had a headache and my whole body was just screaming "tired" at me. When I got home, I left the groceries for the guys and went to change. Next thing I knew, it was 3 a.m. and my stomach was so upset, I spent the next half hour throwing up.  Then I crashed again and slept til 7.

I feel a lot better today and hope it is uneventful. It is raining in downtown TO but I am going to get out at lunch, even if it is for a short walk. My mini is sad.

Points Eaten 20/26(no dinner)
Activity Points Earned 0
Moving 0

Have a good Friday!

Mar 10, 2010

Down A Hole

I fell down a hole today. Unlike Alice, I didn't find Johnny Depp. I am never that lucky.

What did happen?  As some of you know, I work at a construction site. The last few months there has been various road and utilities work done outside our trailer in preparation of the building opening in the summer.

Today, I stepped off the asphalt in front our trailer and my foot dropped about 14 inches. My first thought was, "When the *(*&^& did they put a step there?" My second thought was..."Oh my God, I'm sinking!"

My left foot had sunk up to about midthigh into a hole. The dirt and gravel had just given away under my weight and I sank straight down.  Once again, I wasn't hurt and my coworkers thought it was quite funny and made jokes about me "almost completely disappearing" (a poke at my lack of height!) down the hole.

Once all the safety stuff was taken care of and the area taped and boarded, I went  out for my lunch time walk.

I knew today was going to be different than the last few days, I knew I'd be having dinner with some friends and would get home too late to go for a walk. I knew I'd also have to fit decadent, real Italian food into my food plan for the day.

I committed myself to 2 x 30 minute walks each day for a month to see if that would help me break through the physical and mental barrier I've hit. Out of 7 days I've missed one day and  I want to keep my streak going.

My lunch time walk was still good to go, so I could either extend that to one hour or somewhere fit in the other 30 minute walk.  It was very cold today so I took a different route at lunch time that I hoped would keep me moving since there would be less stopping for traffic.  I ended up walking just a tenth of a mile further in about the same amount of time, but the wind off the lake was bitter, bitter cold and it didn't seem to matter which direction I walked in, I was walking into it.  My eyes were running and stinging from the cold so I didn't extend my lunch walk and kept it to 30 minutes only.  On top of that my  left thigh and hip (the one that went into the hole) was very sore and felt almost weak.

Dinner was at a rustic Italian restaurant where my friend's father is Chef/Owner. There were four of us for dinner and we had a great time, we hadn't all been together since the early summer so it was a great time for catching up and laughing.  I'm a bit of an Italian food snob so when I get the chance to eat real (as in not-North Americanized) Italian food it is such a treat.

I had chicken parmigiana with roasted potatoes and carrots and broccoli and melt-in-your-mouth tiramisiu - every bite was as delicious as my Nonna used to make.

I had to guesstimate the points based on similar dishes I could find the calorie count for, but I'm happy with my choices and I enjoyed my meal immensely.

I'm home now and had thought I might fit in 30 minutes on the treadmill but my left leg and hip is really sore, although I don't see any bruising or anything to indicate why - maybe I pulled a muscle.... so I'm going to call it an early night.

Points Eaten 26/26 + 15 FP
Activity Points Earned 2
Moving 30 min - 1.55 miles

Tuesday's Triumphs

Another good day. Our lovely, double digit, sunshiney weather is having a huge affect on my mood and general outlook on life. I want to do stuff!

I went out at lunch again for my walk and I really pushed myself today to hit the 20 minute mile. I can walk a 18 minute mile on my treadmill on an incline consistently but outside it's harder.I probably do walk a little slower, but I also need to walk around people, stop for lights and cars to make turns into driveways etc and even though I keep my feet moving during that time I am not moving as fast as just walking without interruption. So today, I knew to hit the 20 minute mile I'd have to really walk fast in between the lights and obstacles and I did. I hit 20 minutes exactly, and I felt it! I was exhausted when I got back to the trailer and so thirsty! I downed three big glasses of water right away while I heated up my lunch.

I like the message from Lance Armstrong that the Nike program gives when you beat your best time :) It doesn't take much to make me happy!

I've also noticed that since I've been walking at lunch time, I don't get the 3 o'clock munchies like I used to. I still get hungry around 3 p.m. but I'm not craving sugar like I was before, it's just a normal hungry (if that makes sense!)

Came home from work and went out for another walk, Den didn't feel like it tonight so I went alone. I did 1.44 miles, average - 19.08/mile. Woohoo. I have to admit, there are no stop lights, and only one residential side street to cross, it's pretty much a continuous loop, but it does go up and down - it's not flat.  Biggest Loser tonight, then I have to drive my son's gf home - it's going to be a late night.

Points Eaten 26/26 + 10 FP
Activity Points Earned 5
Moving 58 min walking - 2.59 miles

Mar 8, 2010

Monday Recap

Good day for Day 1 of Operation Back to Basics.

Points Eaten 26/26
Activity Points Earned 4
Moving 57 min walking

I didn’t end up going out with my friend after work, so I went for a walk with my husband around the neighbourhood. Since he had an aneurysm last year, his gait is unsteady and he is much slower than he used to be, now that the weather is warmer and there is no ice for him to slip on, I’m hoping we can get out more often to build up his strength and endurance again.  The first one is my walk with Dennis and you can see my pace was all over the place, because I didn’t want to walk faster than him so every time I got a few steps ahead I’d slow down.  The second one was on my own at lunch and much more steady.  The ups and down in that one are where I had to wait for lights, I just march in place so the sensor doesn’t stop completely, but it does slow down quite a bit.

Here are my stats from the Nike site. (I really, really wish I could just put my mini on here, she’s so cute!) As much as I love the site, I wish it would acknowledge walkers as well as runners or at least give an option to mark the workout as a walk or run, rather than assume everyone is a runner.


Look what else I did today. I know Tiffany is going to be so proud of me! I went by the WW Centre near by home and picked up the New Members Kit. It has a Points book for eating out and basic foods, a 3 month journal and a little recipe book with meal suggestions. That’s page one of my journal for today.


Hello Everyone,

I hope you all had a great weekend.

Mine was good. My oldest son was out of town at a friend's and my youngest loves having the house to himself (somehow he just filters out my husband and I) and was thrilled to have the computer, Playstation and TV without having to share.

On Saturday I took a qiuck trip to Buffalo and picked up some groceries, including Thomas' Bagel Thins. I haven't tried them yet but am looking forward to it. 100 calorie bagels - they would have to taste pretty awful for them to be a no go for me. Although I am limiting processed foods, I'm not at the point where I'm going to make my own bread so I try to limit bread  to 1 slice or 100 calories per meal...and these fit in perfectly for me and if the boys will eat them that makes my life a lot easier as well.  I'll do a proper review once I've had them a few different ways.

I didn't get an actual walk in on Saturday but I did spend a lot of time walking around the stores and parking lots in Buffalo and doing housework once I got home - running up and down flights of stairs with laundry hampers, does that count? Probably not.  I'm ok with that.
Sunday I met my friend Tina and her dog, Sadie, for a walk along the Hamilton Beach Trail. It was a lovely skies, hot sunshine and just a touch of wind to remind us it wasn't quite Spring yet.  The trail was marked every 200 metres so when we had crossed 1km I wanted to check if my Nike+ sensor was tracking accurately so I pulled out my iPod to check, at that moment - Sadie (the dog) decided to cross in front of me. I went tripping over her or her leash, head first and landed on my arms - the iPod went flying out of my hands about 10 feet in front of me.  I was fine, my left hand/arm took the brunt of my fall and was very sore yesterday, I thought I might have sprained it but it's just a little sore today so I think it's fine. My right hand is slightly bruised and sore but other than that - I came out unscathed. My poor iPod though - thankfully it works - the glass didn't crack, but the metal rim around the touch screen is all dinged and scratched up - it looks like it's been through a war.  Oh, and Sadie - she's fine. I thought I might have hurt her when I tripped over her, but Tina said she's fine, she's a big dog and I think when she saw me coming down she got out of the way pretty quickly!

Through all that though - it was calibrated perfectly and tracked the 1km right on the dot!

We ended up walking 3.6 km in total.

Today I'm off for my lunchtime walk in a few minutes and then am meeting another friend tonight for a walk either along the Oakville stretch of Lakeshore Road or at an indoor walking track for at least another 3 km.

Foodwise, I'm doing ok. I'm down 3 of my 6 lbs and still chugging away at the other three. I'm back to basics starting today. Counting points - but committing to eating more of them than I was before - and committing to exercise every day. I know life will throw some spanners in the works now and again and I won't always get 7/7 days but if I commit to them I am more likely to hit 6/7 than if I commit to nothing, you know? When I first started this over a year ago, I had 3 simple rules - I am going back to them starting today and reminding myself that this WORKED, there is no reason for it to not work again.

1. Write down everything I eat.
2. Stay within my WW points (including flex and activity).
3. Move at least 30 min every day.

Pretty simple huh? How did it get so complicated? Where did I go wrong?  At this point, I don't want to dwell on it anymore, I just want to do it and move forward.

Come with me!

Mar 6, 2010

Day 42 - The Beck Diet Solution

We did it !

We're at the last day. If you've been with me all along, I hope you've learned something, or at least been entertained :)

If you've just started, I encourage you to read from Day 1, there's a link at the top of the blog just for the Beck Diet posts.

There are two more chapters after the last day that  I will write about as well, but this is the official last day of the program.

Beck's advice on this day is "Practice, Practice, Practice".

She reminds us to continue all our good habits and use our response cards when we need them as well as on a daily basis.

She reminds us the road won't always be easy.

She reminds us that we have the tools we need to succeed. They are within us. We can do it.

I know I can. I know you can too.

I know I'm strong and determined. I know how much I want this. I know it's not always easy, but   I know there's no choice except to go forward each day.

It's taken me a lot longer than 42 days to go through the program, mostly because I wanted to be comfortable with one strategy before I moved on to another.  I did learn a lot of new strategies and a lot about myself in doing some of her exercises. Some things were reaffirmed for me and some things I just didn't agree with.

At the end of the day, I'm glad I went through her process and I think I am smarter, stronger  and more forgiving of myself for having done it. It's not for everyone and her writing style does get a bit preachy and dry, but I think if you keep an open mind and a willing attitude - you'll learn something too.

Mar 5, 2010

Walking on Sunshine

This is my new BFF, a Nike sensor to use with my iPod Touch.

I am in love with it.  We've had unseasonably warm temperatures the last few days in Toronto and working downtown by the lake is the perfect place to get out for a lunch time walk along Queens Quay. A view of the lake, the Sugar Factory, the CN Tower, the Skydome (yes, I know its the Rogers Centre!), the lovely construction....anyway you get the idea.

I went out yesterday and walked from just east of Jarvis to York Street and back. Exactly 2 kilometres, I know that because I checked the distance on my drive in yesterday morning so I could calibrate my Nike sensor. It was perfect.  The sensor came in at 2.01km - I was impressed.

It's basically a fancy pedometer, but I love how it syncs with the Nike+ site to keep track of my distance, speed and time. I'm still just walking so my poor mini must think I'm the slowest runner ever!!

I had missed walking out doors and missed sunshine. It certainly made my afternoon go faster and my mood more pleasant when I returned to the trailer.  Sometimes I think I feel so cooped up in there but don't realise it!

Other news - my follower count keeps going up and down by 1!  It's like I have a mysterious follower who unlikes me for a time then comes back!!! I know its probably not the same person, but different people coming and going - but it's funny to see the number go up and down by one every couple of days!

For the weekend I have a walk along the Hamilton waterfront planned with my WW friend, Tina and I want to do some more walking tomorrow as well. I'm aiming to give the treadmill a break for a bit and spend some time outside while the weather allows.

Oh best news of today! Lucky, lucky me won a giveaway from Lynn. Isn't this the coolest thing?  I have been a long time journaller and even though I use electronic and digital stuff now, pen and paper is always my best friend in keeping track of my "stuff". I know this is going to be a huge help to me and I have a plan that is going to work perfectly with it.


Day 41 - The Beck Diet Solution

Beck says, "Make a New To Do List".

The list should be of all the new habits you've learned and the ones that are going to keep you on the weight loss straight and narrow and make you successful.

She lists activities to do daily, weekly and "as needed".

Here are my lists.

Exercise each day. Aim for 30-45 minutes.
At least 90% of my calories must come from whole, real foods.
Drink 8 glasses of water each day, minimum.
Spend 10 minutes each day reading my response cards and mentally preparing for the day ahead.
Read those blogs that inspire me, make me laugh and teach me something :)
Spend some time reading something I enjoy every night before bed. 

Weigh in!
Review my food journals and blog entries and see where I can improve next week.
Blog at least 3 days a week.
Menu plan and try one new recipe a week.
Get out of the trailer (at work) at least 3x a week during lunch.

As needed
Review my response card.
Check in with my diet coach.
Ask for help when I need it, with work, with home stuff, with anything!
Give myself a reality check when I start to get overwhelmed.

These are mostly things I do now but the reminder to stay the course was good.

Mar 4, 2010

Happy Birthday Liam and 13 Things I Want To Remember


Liam 13 Coolness starts at 13 :)

Happy Birthday Liam!!!

Liam is my youngest son, he's 13 today.

I feel old.

I took this idea from Rachael's blog and it seemed fitting for today.


Today, the thirteen things I never want to forget about you:

  1. Your beautiful, shy smile.
  2. You always remember to tell me I look nice (when I do).
  3. You are an old soul, much wiser than your 13 years.
  4. I love how you love cheese and crackers any time of the day.
  5. Thank you for watching endless cooking shows with me.
  6. You have the greenest eyes and the longest, thickest lashes I have ever seen.
  7. You have a genuine curiousity about people that makes you sensitive and kind.
  8. Your hair is longer than mine!
  9. Your love of reading.
  10. How you can never remember what day it is, in an absent minded professor sort of way.
  11. Plox!
  12. You are a peacekeeper, always the first to apologise, to smooth things over and to remind us all that love is the most important thing.
  13. You live in the moment and make every moment special.

Tonight at his birthday dinner. He was fed up of photos by this time – but Mom wasn’t!!



    Day 40 - The Beck Diet Solution

    Day 40 is entitled "Enrich Your Life".  Beck addresses the issue of how overweight people put their life on hold until that magical day they are no longer fat.

    You know what I mean. When I lose this weight, I'll.......

    What are you waiting to do when you lose weight?

    Of course, there are some things that are not physically possible to do when you're obese or even overweight, skydiving comes to mind!

    But she is addressing the psychological barriers we put on ourselves.  Have you done this? Convinced yourself you can't go to the beach until you look good in a bathing suit?
    Can't run until you're skinny?
    Can't go on vacation until your legs look good in shorts?
    Can't go on a date until you lose 20lbs?

    Beck says to live now, stop putting your life on hold for that magical day. Live now and enjoy life and do those things that you want to do. Your life will be enriched, your confidence will soar and you will learn to love yourself more.

    I honestly believe that loving yourself is key to this whole journey. That happens when you start to treat yourself the way you treat everyone else you love the most, when you start letting yourself do what you want, what you love and what inspires you.

    Sure, as you lose weight, you will naturally gravitate towards doing things you didn't do before, but start now.

    Remember, we're not promised tomorrow.

    Mar 3, 2010

    Day 39 - The Beck Diet Solution

    On Day 39, Beck talks about "Keeping up with Exercise".  She acknowledges that is harder for some people than sticking with their new way of eating (yeah, that would be me!) and suggests some strategies for overcoming the "I don' wanna exercise" blues.
    I actually read this chapter about 2 months ago (I'm so behind on posting) and implemented some of her strategies to get me into the habit of exercising 5-6 x a week, even though I still don't like it or really look forward to it.

    1. Focus on how you'll feel after you finish exercising.
    2. Put exercise in the NO CHOICE category (this is the one that works for me the most!)
    3. Meet a friend or trainer.
    4. Give yourself lots of credit (I am so bad at this)
    5. Focus on your progress (this one motivates me, to beat myself and to challenge myself)
    6. End your session with something positive (chocolate? - just kidding!!, the end is positive enough for me!)
    7. Make sure you're doing a type of exercise you like. (Um..sure.....there might be one out there....)

    I don't like formal exercise. I don't like "having" to exercise. I love hiking,  I love walking through a beautiful park in the Fall or along the lake on a summer's day.  These things are specific and I don't like doing them if they're not perfect, does that make sense?

    I've gotten better at fitting spontaneous exercise into my day. I park furthest from the mall or store entrance, I walk a few blocks to pick up groceries, I get off  the bus or subway a few stops early and walk the rest of the way, not that I use public transportation very often..but when I do, I make an effort. I take the stairs as much as possible. I actually run up and down our stairs at home now, I could barely walk up them this time last year.

    I don't know if I will ever love exercise. The feeling aftwards, that endorphin rush....sure it's nice for a while, but its really not a motivator for me. I like to challenge myself with my pedometer, to see if I can do 500 more steps than yesterday, or on my treadmill - beating my time by 30 seconds over a week or going farther in the same amount of time. Mindgames like that keep me interested, yet I am not competitive with other people. I don't want to race someone or "win". That just turns me off.

    Mostly I just tell myself, there's no choice. You have to do this. Just do it, get it over with and then you can do what you really want, usually read :)

    Where am I?

    Today I feel a bit lost.

    I am feeling like I am not sure what to do now. Which is silly, because I have been doing it - eating properly, exercising 5-6 times a week - but I feel like I am in limbo somewhere.

    I know that eating less and moving more (Hi Dawne and Jack) works for some people, but I need structure, I need rules. I'm data driven and I like to "know" what I'm eating and how much I'm exercising.  It makes me feel more in control of myself and my habits. I know that some people say it's just trading one obsession for another, but I don't think it is. I didn't get to 250lbs and Type II diabetes because I knew what I was doing - I got there because I didn't know what I was doing,  I didn't know how much I was eating, how little I was exercising. If you had asked me (back then)  I would have told you I mostly eat well and I'm active.  Well, compared to now, I was a sloth and I ate like every day was my last meal.

    For this week, I haven't been counting calories or points. I've just been eating like I always do and exercising but I feel...scared? I don't know if that's the right word. I feel like I'm on a tightwire with no safety net or driving without my seat belt. 

    So, still working on that one. In the meantime, working on losing these $&**!@ 6 lbs that I gained back. 2 down, 4 to go.