Mar 15, 2018

And so it goes.

Still here.

Still floundering.

This week I committed to tracking every day, since I haven't been since after the dental surgery in January.  Four for four so far. I have not had a 'perfect' WW day yet but just tracking makes me more mindful and focused.

I am struggling with fibromyalgia pain more this Winter than in the past. Every muscle in my body aches.  I know the inflammation in my jaw is not helping and less than stellar diet is not helping.  I can control one of those things.  Easier to type out than do, it seems.

I am hoping that Winter is on the way out and as the weather improves so will my pain which will lead to better sleep, which will lead to better energy which will lead to being able to go for a walk and being able to do more than just function to get through the day.

I had my endocrinologist appointment last week. I really don't like this Doctor.  My previous endo was awesome. She had a private practice. This endo is part of a clinic at a teaching hospital which means I see a (different) resident each time I go first, who has to recap my entire life's medical history with me (because it's the first and only time they will ever see me!) and then I wait to see the endo. He then comes in for 30 seconds, writes a prescription and leaves. I'm sure he's a brilliant and capable doctor, but I don't feel like he is taking care of me as an individual and I do feel he is dismissive when I ask him questions.

That's a problem for another day.

My weight on the clinic scale was 207.  I know from past experience, that scale is about 3-4 lbs heavier than the WW scale and I am also dressed in different clothes when I go to the clinic versus when I go to WW.  So I'm thinking it's probably 204 which is where I was last time I went to WW in January.  Of course, if I went back I would know for sure. 

Today, everything seems overwhelming.

I do not do well without a clear plan.  I do not do well when I feel like a plan is hopeless.

Tomorrow is a new day :)


3 comments:

  1. A few days ago, I started logging my food again too. Right now my food diary is scary, but at least I am getting myself back into this habit. I don't do well without a plan either, so I am hunting for one, even if it's just a new workout DVD set with a calendar. Are you looking for another doctor? I don't like feeling dismissed by a doctor (or anyone) either, but especially not about something as important as health.

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  2. It's a vicious circle... You would do better if you felt better; and you would feel better if you could do better... Eating cleaner will reduce *some* of the inflammation, but it's hard to eat clean when you feel like crap and have no motivation. I KNOW that SPRING will help, the light will help, the snow (for me) going away will help. And we're doing the best we can; AND we can do better. I'm thinking of you!!!!

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  3. I hate it when doctors don't listen to you.

    You are taking the baby steps necessary to get back on track.

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